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You are reading an article written by a citizen of eRepublik, an immersive multiplayer strategy game based on real life countries. Create your own character and help your country achieve its glory while establishing yourself as a war hero, renowned publisher or finance guru.

WHPR[Day 1326] Hot for Trot

Day 1,326, 09:56 • Published in USA USA

• by James S. Brady Press Room

OK Everyone, we’re starting in 60 seconds…

What was that? Yes, you in the third row. I couldn’t hear you… What are you saying?

Oh. Yes... That.

Well, um… let me apologize for the smell in here. Apparently there was a Caveman around here last month and, well, Cavemen do what Cavemen do in caves… We’ve got BioHaz Cleanup due in here next hour.

(No but seriously, Thanks to Chutley and Civil Anarchy for taking care of WHPR last month. These are two of my very best eRep friends.)

OK, right out of the box, The Blank Keating Administration wishes to extend a massive thank you to everyone who took part in an historic election. You deserve respect, eUSA, this Nation is wide awake.

We also accept whatever high standard you’d like for evaluation of our accomplishments. This team was not put together to fill slots, but to get work done. Expect greatness. We can all do This together.

Index
1. Administrative Personnel
2. War FAQ
3. Spotlight: Department of Media
4. Pony Express
5. eNASA (hold your nose if you must. Just dooo eeet.)

Good Morning America,

Here is your White House Administration.

President: Blank Keating
First Lady: Fionia
Vice President: Marxus

Chief of Staff: CivilAnarchy
Deputy Chief of Staff: Jude Connors

Secretary Defense: Alexander_Auctoritas
Deputy SoDs: BradleyReala, Vanek26, shadow6463
NSC Director: Vanek26
OMS Director: Michael Larson
Arm America Director: Zyria
Arm America Deputy: npaidi

Secretary of State: Paul Proteus
Deputies: Tim_Holtz, Soren Nelson
Director of Ambassadorial Affairs: deershark

Secretary of the Interior: Lysander Spooner 2
Vice Secretary of the Interior: TBD
Deputies: TBD

Secretary of Media: Gnilraps
Deputy Secretary of Media: George Pumpkinette
Secretary of Education: TBD

Secretary of Treasury: Anyonymous
Deputy Secretary of Treasury: Evry

Secretary of Technology: TBC
Congressional Liaison: TBD
Kelly McGillis: Chickensguys

CIA Director: Pfluffer
NSA Director: Laxsnor

Advisors:
Avruch
Emerick
Glove
Max McFarland 2
CRoy
Colin Lantrip
Cromstar

If you would like to join the Administrative Team, apply here: Application to serve.

War FAQ

Why the hells am I asked to fight for our pig-disgusting enemy “against the eUSA” sometimes?

Easy Peasy. The battle mechanics of eRepublik dictate that a nation can only attack a region that borders one of its currently-held regions. So whomever occupies Nebraska, for instance, has the option of attacking Iowa, Colorado, Kansas, South Dakota, Missouri, and Wyoming (google them yourselves). Those are Nebraska’s border states.

Sometimes it behooves us to have a particular enemy of ours occupy a particular territory of ours to block another enemy of ours from being able to attack another strategically valuable region. Reread that. It is therefore sometimes in the best interest of National security to Militarily determine what Nation controls a certain region, even if that means "not us". By fighting “against the eUSA”, you are actually fighting FOR THE eUSA!

How come DoD orders are not a more reliable source for where to spend my damage?
The DoD Newspaper has been the most cherished Political Football in the history of eUSA politics. Because of its subscription numbers (which by now are totally inflated by dead people and since the death of the "subscription" are no longer even relevant) and its history as the media pulse of Citizen Damage, that org and its associated newspaper are considered a Jewel.

Security on that org is tight.

Which means we are at the mercy of a very few individuals who have access to keep it updated. If those few are available to update DoD, DoD will be current. If other concerns occupy their online attention, then DoD falls behind.

What the Department of Media can do as a solution to this is to ask you to rely on the NBS for your battle orders. NBS is updatable by a larger number of people. The DoM is working to get a coordinated staff who will keep the NBS orders current. BTW, it works seamlessly with eRep Advance.

Are we winning?

No.

Really, nothing has changed globally since we got wiped. Our enemies are still more strongly allied than we are. We can expect a Resistance War holding pattern until our Political momentum can be parlayed into a more strategic alliance of powers. Meanwhile, we have to be guerilla warriors, RW’ing our damage like a rook on a chess board. Be squirrely America. And fight as ordered.

Next WHPR: “How do I level-up more quickly?”

Spotlight: Department of Media

The WHPR will be a constant presence for your benefit. Our team will keep it filled with critical information pertaining to whatever situations are current. Important happenings will be discussed as they unfold. And unless George Pumpkinette or I fall way off our rockers, there will be no cox.

Speaking of George Pumpkinette, my choice of him as Deputy has to do with what I think he will do particularly well, meticulously maintain the BBCode of our WHPR so that it looks and functions like a Porsche at 115mph. He’s a fine publisher who will make our country proud as Deputy Secretary of Media.

The Pony Express is about to ride again. Since what is left of the Pony Express has been declared dead by all persons involved (and compounded by the loss of the org password), I am taking the liberty as Secretary of Media to resurrect the Old Grey Mare and inject her with some fine steroids.

A Public Pony Express is a fantastic potential retention tool. When I was first starting 16 Shells, it was a series of mentions in Jude Connors’ Pony Express that motivated me to up the quality of my paper. Getting noticed is a good drug for retaining players to eRep. So I am fully invested in producing a Pony Express that will increase the competitiveness and readership in our Nation’s Media, and hopefully player retention.

Until the Pony Express org password is recovered, WHPR will serve as the home of the Pony Express. This will make WHPR a bit long. Shut up.

As Secretary of Media, I will serve as Pony Express Dispatch. But I will be relying on a team of Pony Express Riders, each one charged with a route. If you would like to be a Pony Express Rider, send a PM.

Here is your Pony Express Staff:

Dispatch Director: Gnilraps
Dispatch Coordinator: George Pumkinette
Circuit Riders: thecrafter, Rainy Sunday

International Riders:
Max McFarland 2
Auggustus
Jovan Tjekila
Aeroner
SendersonAmca
Emerick

Economic Riders:
Darrel Anderson 2
Marc Aldrix

Political Riders:
Tendou
Jude Connors
Paul Proteus

Military Riders:
Sir Valaro Volcrum
Ghost Killah
Salinger

Education Riders:
Scott1
Robert E Lee

eUSA Forum Rider:
Hank Arundel

Entertainment Riders:
Chutley
Thedillpickl
Jon Malcom
Josh Whitehead

In addition to a regular Pony Express Dispatch, links to top-notch articles will be published through the National Broadcast System. If you don’t have this installed yet, shame on you.