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The Thanksgiving Pardoning of the Bird

Day 2,924, 18:02 • Published in USA Japan

• by Schubacca

As Thanksgiving is coming up in a few days I should take a time out to say thanks to each and every eAmerican fighting on the front lines. Without you I probably be lost and sitting on the floor pondering where has future gone while under occupation of another nation...umm Serbia maybe! Yikes! Psst I hope I am not giving any ideas to the enemy.

Thanks to efforts to our glorious leader Wild Owl he has lived up to every word he said he would do for my expectations. As a individual running for congress I am learning so much from everyone I wish I was a bird too. Maybe I could be a flamingo, a duck, or perhaps Mockingjay. However I prefer the bald eagle because its a noble bird. Who's to say that the odds are still in our favor? The matter is it comes down to is trust.

With congressional elections due to occur I am making my pledge that I am laying down my hatchet. I have no beef with anyone. Surely haven't been around long to make any enemies. To me I just want to get along and listen to everyone's point of view. If I gain the knowledge through civil discussions that only makes me a better person. Whether or not I will be elected to congress it is only the beginning, not surely an end. The only beef I want is that slab of meat sitting on a plate to enjoy but not to throw at anyone.

Speaking of beef that brings me to announce the pardoning of the bird. This year for the first time The Lone Star Reporter picks that Wild Owl will be pardoned. Somewhat nontraditional since it should be a turkey but since Wild Owl is doing good our fearless deserves some relaxation knowing that he will live another day not being someone's dinner on some redneck's plate in the southern United States. It will utterly disgust me even more if that redneck said, "Yep he tastes like chicken." Wild Owl today you are officially pardoned as this will mark this year's first historical "Thanksgiving Pardoning of the Bird".