DVE KRAVE / TWO COWS

Day 2,036, 23:19 • Published in Serbia Serbia • by Nikola Nikolic I


English

SOCIALISM: You have 2 cows and give one to the neighbor.

COMMUNISM: You have 2 cows. The government takes both and give you a little milk.

FASCISM: You have 2 cows. The government takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM: You have 2 cows. The government takes both and shoot you.

Bureaucracy: You have two cows. The government takes both, shoot one, milk the other, and put the milk.

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and revenue growth. You sell them and retire with a high profit margin.

AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows: sell one terrace and the other to make a milk four cows. Later, you hire an expert to examine why the cow dropped dead.

JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. Re-engineer them to be one-tenth of the size of an ordinary cow and give twenty times the milk. Then you make that call her cunning cartoon Cow-mon and endorse them all over the world.

GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. Prepravis them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

BRITISH CORPORATION: You have two cows. Both are mad.

ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows but you do not know where they are. Go to the lunch break.

RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them and realize that there are 5 cows. You count them again and realize you have 5 cows. You count them again and you realize that you have 42 cows. You count them again and you realize that you have 2 cows. Stop to count and open a new bottle of vodka.

CHINESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that the employment rate is 100%, high yields of milk, and arrest journalists who published figures.

INDIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You love them until they drop dead.

NA SRPSKOM

SOCIJALIZAM: Imas 2 krave i jednu das komsiji.

KOMUNIZAM: Imas 2 krave. Vlada ti uzme obe i da ti malo mleka.

FASIZAM: Imas 2 krave. Vlada ti uzme obe i proda ti malo mleka.

NACIZAM:Imas 2 krave. Vlada ti uzme obe i strelja te.

BIROKRATIZAM: Imas 2 krave. Vlada ti uzme obe, strelja jednu, pomuze drugu i baci mleko.

TRADICIONALNI KAPITALIZAM:Imas 2 krave. Prodas jednu i kupis bika. Tvoje stado se mnozi i prihodi rastu. Prodas ih sve i penzionises se s velikom zaradom.

AMERICKA KORPORACIJA:Imas 2 krave: Prodas jednu i teras drugu da proizvodi mleko kao cetiri krave. Kasnije zaposlis eksperta da ispita zasto je krava crkla.

FRANCUSKA KORPORACIJA:Imas 2 krave. Stupas u strajk zato sto hoces 3 krave.

JAPANSKA KORPORACIJA: Imas 2 krave. Redizajniras ih da budu velicine desetog dela obicne krave i da daju dvadeset puta vise mleka. Onda napravis lukav crtani koji nazoves Kravomon i reklamiras ih po celom svetu.

NEMACKA KORPORACIJA: Imas 2 krave. Prepravis ih tako da zive 100 godina, jedu jednom mesecno i same sebe muzu.

BRITANSKA KORPORACIJA: Imas 2 krave. Obe su lude.

ITALIJANSKA KORPORACIJA:Imas 2 krave ali ne znas gde su. Odes na pauzu za rucak.

RUSKA KORPORACIJA:Imas 2 krave. Prebrojis ih i shvatis da ima 5 krava. Ponovo ih prebrojis i shvatis da ima 5 krava. Ponovo ih prebrojis i shvatis da imas 42 krave. Ponovo ih prebrojis i shvatis da imas 2 krave. Prestanes da brojis i otvoris novu flasu votke.

KINESKA KORPORACIJA:Imas 2 krave. Imas 300 ljudi da ih muzu. Tvrdis da je zaposlenost 100%, visoki prinosi mleka, i uhapsis novinara koji je objavio cifre.

INDIJSKA KORPORACIJA:Imas 2 krave. Obozavas ih dok ne crknu.

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