Christmas wishes
Mack Craft
I may have already wished you a Happy and Merry Christmas but if I haven’t then please accept this special greeting, but it is difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with my lawyer yesterday, and on advice I wish to say the following :
Please accept with no obligation , implied or implicit , my best wishes for an environmentally conscious , socially responsible , low stress , non addictive , gender neutral celebration of the summer solstice holiday practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious / secular persuasions and / or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all .
I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2011 , but not without due respect for the calendar of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great ( not to imply that eAustralia is necessarily greater than any other country ) and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee .
By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms :
This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her / him or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. The wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher .
Best Regards ( without prejudice )
Name withheld ( Privacy Act ).
Comments
...lol merry
i shall only reciprocate these wishes only after my lawyer has a read of the said document and gives me permission to reciprocate the wishes held in the said document
bugger that Mack you still haven't sent me that statement regarding you returning my bra...
Dear "withheld"
After reading your newspaper article,it has come to my attention that i am mentioned in it, ("I also wish you a fiscally successful"). I find these words harshful and considering your are a respected citizen, is disappointing to be heard from you. I have contacted my lawyer about these words and you will be contacted by my lawyer and the eAuthorities.
Thank You
~all i want for christmas is a quarter ounce of hash ~
I lol'd so hard.
lol mg