All the very same butt naked

Day 2,492, 14:09 • Published in Argentina Argentina • by Guxter
#0 Introduction

Yes, of course. You came here cause of but ( sorry, an extra “T” went to the tittle without noticing) naked . You should have known that site managers do not allow that. Ah! You already knew it? And, in addition, hurried up to arrive before banning? Well, your naiveness is success of our marketing department. But wait, stay a while and maybe you´ll feel not so disappointed.

Girl snaked

Be welcome reader to the pilot edition of the paper that will provide everything your eyes ever wanted to caress in the publishing eWorld .
Some cynic might think that this will be another rag used only in search of a mission, but he`ll be ignorant of a team of writers and creatives who have worked tirelessly for months to offer the best material in order to enrich your elife.
As befits an introduction, we will proceed with the pleasure of introducing the different sections and contents that will compound this beacon of information and culture.

Culture and info in the dark

Internacional politics
Here you can find analyzes of the same old wars with the expected enemies. Always with a perspective that rips alliances to which we don´t belong and overstating excessively our temporary friends and brothers ,

alliances



We´ll show graphically the movement of military forces and developments of campaigns through ininteligible maps that will make you look silly decisions as sophisticated strategies .

Map with arrows at war

Fittingly, we will encourage irrational hatred against ecountries, calling its members with the most derogatory attributes, like they are redheads, penile disabled, coprophilous, runts, women and other vileness.

Enemy ecountry citizen

As it should be, our review will be invariably accompanied by unrelated to Erepublik patriotish images in order to inflame our worth of better purposes nationalism .

Patriot

Local politics
With eLife you will never lose sight of our circumstantial authorities mistakes and you´ll get the chance to share countless insults intended to a mandatory request of impeachment, based on his clear servile and treacherous attitude towards our beloved eCountry.

As if this were not enough, also ...

- Gossip of our elife in “Forum small talk “

- Women´s corner. Because they are a minimum part of ER too.

- Weekly Horoscope.

- Movie reviews. Because while you wait energy recharge or that BH that longs to arrive, and having touched yourself a couple of times as a victim of pornography (and what the hell, we´re not going out to see if sun shines), why not see a cinema jewel online?

- Surveys and studies done by the most prestigious institutions and our research team on "Did you know that..."

- Leading articles with the most repeated criticisms to Plato

- The phrases of the day to bring light to your eexistence

- Love inquiries forum, because, besides to erase our bum-crack in front of the screen, we feel.

And all this in an environment that will not neglect aesthetics and good taste. To this end, our pages will be furnished with women with the least amount of clothes that Plato's embarrassment can stand, and at the same time might be the misogynist audiences delight.

Woman hardly dressed

In the same route, and knowing that the vast majority of our population is functionally illiterate and only looks at pics, we will not spare to offer any image it may seem attractive to someone like you, as well as those of weapons, warriors and warfare that will infuse us the motivation and courage to press the left mouse button.

Attractive image

War scene

I wanna be him

OK, folks, here we have come up with our presentation, not without benefit you with an exclusive promotion.
Those five (5 if you never saw it written) first readers who subscribe our publication, will be rewarded with a free month subscription for new telepathic Wi Fi * ** service provided by our sponsor MindNet®.

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Editor's Note
If you, dear reader, are feeling possessed by the spirit of Shakespeare, Marx (Groucho) or Bukowski, before calling an exorcist or kill yourself, send us your writings and we´ll consider publishing in our media, of course, naming the contributor.

Community service
Suicide possessed by writer´s spirit Care Center : 054 011 448 4848. Warning: If you are taken by the spirit of Saint Exupery, do not bother calling. Brain death is irreversible. Check it with an electroencephalograph at hand.

Without anything else, and thanking your presence, we request that suscribe this paper and vote and shout this article. We are not interested in Media Mogul but the recognition that their gold awards.
Until next shipment, friends!

P.S : As you already notice, English is not our native language. Don´t be an smart ass criticizing and leaving us as barbarians. Feel free to send corrections that we´ll probably ignore like morons we are, and try to make a better eworld