What you thinking about Wook? [Issue 1]
Day 1,988, 08:17
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Published in United Kingdom 
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by
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by WookieO
What'choo talkin' about Willis Wook?
Well I hope that this will be the start of an irregularly released series of articles where I reveal to you what I've been pondering over the last week or so. It might even give you an insight into what makes a hairy bugger like me tick.
You would, wouldn't you?
Apocalypse Now?
What wouldMartin Sheen you do?
Due to the ever increasing amount of post-apocalyptic fiction I've been watching and reading of late I've begun to ask myself important questions during work, on the train, or even on the throne.
Do I have enough candles/tins of food/batteries? Is my house defensible?? Have I learned enough from Bear Grylls, Ray Mears and Bruce Parry???
Would I look good clad in leather????
I've come to the conlusion after much soul searching that, no, I would not. This is slightly upsetting, but I feel I'd most definitely be able to pull off wearing dungarees, which has lessened the pain.
I've realised that I've been looking at buildings near my work and working out which one would be the best to make a stand in if needed. Fortunately I'm just around the corner from the Tower of London. I believe that'd do...in a pinch.
Off with my head?
So...now that I'm holed up in the Tower's Jewel House, surrounded by my personal guard of zombie Beefeaters and trained commando ravens...where are the women who need a hirsute, virile protector to possibly impregnate them and repopulate the world?
Well obviously this is an area I've thought of a lot....and I do mean A LOT!
As a young teenager watching The Terminator for the first time I felt a bond with Kyle Reese and I certainly felt strong feelings towards Linda Hamilton's Sarah Connor. The kind of strong feelings that a teenager employs to certain ends whilst ruining his Dad's VHS player by constantly pausing and rewinding scenes from science fiction films where boobies appear.
Ahem.
Anyway the upshot of all of this is when I wake up and find out it's a Tuesday morning, the world hasn't ended and I've still got to put the bins out, iron a shirt and then go to work...well, I feel rather disappointed.
Bring on the Apocalypse I say! A brighter future beckons...
Well I hope that this will be the start of an irregularly released series of articles where I reveal to you what I've been pondering over the last week or so. It might even give you an insight into what makes a hairy bugger like me tick.
You would, wouldn't you?
Apocalypse Now?
What would
Due to the ever increasing amount of post-apocalyptic fiction I've been watching and reading of late I've begun to ask myself important questions during work, on the train, or even on the throne.
Do I have enough candles/tins of food/batteries? Is my house defensible?? Have I learned enough from Bear Grylls, Ray Mears and Bruce Parry???
Would I look good clad in leather????
I've come to the conlusion after much soul searching that, no, I would not. This is slightly upsetting, but I feel I'd most definitely be able to pull off wearing dungarees, which has lessened the pain.
I've realised that I've been looking at buildings near my work and working out which one would be the best to make a stand in if needed. Fortunately I'm just around the corner from the Tower of London. I believe that'd do...in a pinch.
Off with my head?
So...now that I'm holed up in the Tower's Jewel House, surrounded by my personal guard of zombie Beefeaters and trained commando ravens...where are the women who need a hirsute, virile protector to possibly impregnate them and repopulate the world?
Well obviously this is an area I've thought of a lot....and I do mean A LOT!
As a young teenager watching The Terminator for the first time I felt a bond with Kyle Reese and I certainly felt strong feelings towards Linda Hamilton's Sarah Connor. The kind of strong feelings that a teenager employs to certain ends whilst ruining his Dad's VHS player by constantly pausing and rewinding scenes from science fiction films where boobies appear.
Ahem.
Anyway the upshot of all of this is when I wake up and find out it's a Tuesday morning, the world hasn't ended and I've still got to put the bins out, iron a shirt and then go to work...well, I feel rather disappointed.
Bring on the Apocalypse I say! A brighter future beckons...
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Nice, I too have often assessed my survival plans in such situations.
First a quick raid on Green's for a generator and axe, then a wee jaunt to the shops for a few munchies and as many coins as I can 'liberate' before heading off to the pier. Which has both the handy features of a single entrance with a nice big gate and all the fun of the seaside.
That's what the generator and coins are for, So I may live out my existence post apocalypse with the soothing thrills of winning and losing two p's over and over. ^ _ ^
Ah yes, good clean honest childhood fun to see you through the end days...
voted , good article .
Voted, as a man inflicted with the hair of a sexy captain caveman i can sympathise with your plight. Luckily I have a Mrs who likes a man with a 1970's porn star chest \o/
Aye, my wife loves my hairy beardy weirdy-ness...in fact one New Year's Eve I decided to shave and she almost ran screaming from the house until she realised it was me...then she was just left disappointed!
Yep, I had the same problem with Klurr when I was wearing a blaclava to act out on of her fantasys...about a removal man taking away her couch whilst wearing a balaclava. Well she said that but it turned out she just wanted her couch taking to the tip.
I lost my train of thought but I'm dating a red head with massive cleavage...that is all
Mmmmmm.....massive cleavage.....
Voted for great justice
Wayne and I will be laughing at all you scrambling to survive as we sail around in our canal boat catamaran. All your supplies are belong to us.