Wednesday's Daily Dose

Day 2,528, 02:59 Published in United Kingdom United Kingdom by Nights0ul

Potpourri



"I am not young enough to know everything."

--Oscar Wilde



Jokes

A mother and daughter were doing dishes while the father and son were watching television in the living room. Suddenly, there was a loud crash of plates breaking, then complete silence.

The son turned to look at his father. "It's mummy!"

Father: "How do you know?"

Son: "Easy! She didn't say anything."

-o-o-o-o-

Two women were bemoaning the state of the National Health Service.

One said, "Do you know, my ninety-three-year-old mother has been waiting over a year for her operation?"

"That's appalling," said the other woman. "What a terrible way to treat someone of that age."

"I know," said the first woman. "It got so bad that at one point I even said to her, 'Mum, do you really need bigger boobs?'"

-o-o-o-o-

Brittaby, aged 4, had an earache and wanted a pain killer. She tried in vain to take the lid off the bottle.

Seeing her frustration, her Mom explained it was a child-proof cap and she'd have to open it for her.

Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked, "How does it know it's me?"

-o-o-o-o-

If it is true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?