The Fall of The Third Republic

Day 837, 12:10 • Published in South Africa India • by Stephen van Joergborg

eSouth Africa.

Today is a day that will live on throughout history. A day you will remember for the rest of your lives.

Today is the last day of the Third Republic. The day South Africa burns.



I am now going to walk you through our plan. Why? Well, partly for our own amusement but also to show you just how little you ever knew or understood. Did you really believe that your pathetic attempts at counter intelligence and the Ministry of Security were any match for us?



We begin our tale many moons ago in a far off land called Venezuela. Those of you who fancy an extended History lesson can look up our entry on Encyclopedia Dramatica, but for the rest of you I'll keep it short and sweet. A group of anons from 7chan decided to start off in Venezuela and day by day their numbers increased. We arrived and we set about working and building our group. But some did not accept our presence. The locals of Venezuela, the "elites" if you will did not take kindly to us. Despite our honourable intentions and contributions to the economy, they belittled us, called us PTOers, trolls, "channers". The lot. We tried to talk to them (despite what you might think), oh yes. But were they welcoming? Well I think we all know the answer to that...

So our objectives changed. No longer did we seek to simply play the game and coexist peacefully. No. We wanted revenge, we wanted to teach the Venezuelans a lesson. And teach them a lesson we did. We took congress and decided we'd have a bit of fun, we raised taxes and the minimum wage. We reverted them again of course, but still the natives did not understand, still they abused us and hated us. However we were naive. We had not been playing long and we made the fatal mistake of taking congress, but not the presidency. What did the natives do? Well, they would rather have nothing then be ruled by foreigners and so their president Casiopea95 betrayed the entire country by retreating all the regions. To Brazil nonetheless, ironic isn't it?

After the fall of Venezuela we were left in limbo. Homeless and without direction we arrived on the shores of South Africa. This time we were convinced we'd be welcomed, after all speaking English is actually encouraged rather than being a crime. But no, you were exactly the same, in fact no, you were worse... And so a similar situation arised. We wanted to teach you a lesson, nothing more, but then things turned nasty.

I won't go into detail about what's happened, you all know. We've suffered nothing but a campaign of hatred and harrassment from you. And so we started to plan for our ultimate revenge.

Firstly we needed a party. Not just any party but a top 5 party. We knew it wouldn't be easy and considered trying to take one by force, but we realised that subtlety would be the key. It just so happened we had someone within a party at a sufficient level to run without arising suspicion. Myself and Walter Beldingford ran in other parties as blocking candidates to draw away the anti-PTO votes. Neither of us won and you celebrated it as a day of victory, little knowing everything had gone exactly as planned.

.

We didn't want to arouse suspicion and so most of our group didn't run for congress. We decided to run 14 candidates, just enough to stop an impeachment. And no one realised, no one suspected, your "chan threat level" remained "low". Everything was going as expected. However the results of congress were kind to us, but not kind enough. Only 12 of us were elected; not enough to stop an impeachment. We were worried. Yes this was a lot and one or two native votes would swing it in our favour, but we had to be sure. Our plan simply had no room for error.

So when we heard you were planning a Resistance War in Gauteng we simply couldn't believe our luck. Behind the scenes we convinced you to stage it before presidential elections. True, the actual decision was entirely out of our hands, but we pulled a lot of strings that day and once again you seriously underestimated just how far our influence extends.

And so just as planned several of your congress members simply couldn't resist the opportunity to "fight the good fight" and be a true South African patriot. We now had enough to block an impeachment and were right back on track. As an experiment I decided to impeach Mark Morcom on the last available day, I did not expect the 7 day rule to stand when a new president was elected, but it turns out it does. You really ought to fix that one Admins...

And so presidential elections. I will admit that in the run up to things we weren't entirely confident, but we knew we had a chance. Our candidates' platform was unexpected and raised a few eyebrows, but ultimately dismissed as an unlikely contender just as we had planned.

We now come to the day itself. Yesterday in fact. Once again our lessons in Venezuela served us well. Our candidate was not expected to do well and so we sat back and we waited. We knew if we attempted to keep pace with the frontrunners you would unite behind a single candidate, something we could not compete with. And so we waited. Watching as the votes for Remon777 and Greyhunter were roughly equal. Once we were confident most of you had voted we unleashed our votes. All of our group voted in the last few hours. Unsporting maybe, but not against the rules, and a tactic you yourselves have used on numerous occasions if I am not mistaken. And guess what, we were correct again; in the last few hours of the voting Independent Alternative president mulderpf instructed his own party members to vote for Greyhunter. You had indeed united, but it was too late.

And so we reach the present. Well, I'm sure you can see exactly what is happening so I'll leave the story here.

Hope you can speak Portugese.

Hugs and Kisses,

Stephen




P.S. And no. Wrong. RonelI was not hacked. She's been with us for a while now. How do you think we had access to all your secret boards? How do you think we knew your every move? How do you think we knew about Jaccil's "plan" to send his ex-CIA friends after us? Bingo. If you want to know exactly why this has happened then do not look at us. Look at yourselves. You could have stopped this, you had the chance.

P.P.S. And yes I know full well in all likelyhood I'll probably be b& for this and no I don't care. My work here is done and I'll need citizenship in whichever country we decide to rape next. But just for the record we never broke any rules. Nope, we didn't use multies, our numbers are far, far greater than you think; once again you fatally underestimated us, I think we're onto a running theme here don't you agree?