2nd Platoon, Company B - eUnited States Marine Corps

Day 1,384, 21:56 • Published in USA Ireland • by Fitisin

A little mood music: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-64CaD8GXw

For nearly two years, I've watched the monsters of the eUS Marine Corps feed on the dreams of Serbian and Hungarian players as their dastardly and evil plans for domination were erased in an instant by the historic, psychotically powerful Marines of the eUnited States.

From the Battle of Nunavut, four or so days after I joined this damn game to the present day; the eUSMC has brought the pain to eAmerica's enemies. It took twenty-two months, but I am at last ready and able to join the most brilliant, able and brutally efficient force in the New World.


eUS Marines storming the beaches of Nunavut in 2009. This was exceptionally difficult and brave, because Nunavut has no beaches.

And they made me an officer - to which I say...

WHAT THE F*** ARE YOU PEOPLE THINKING!?!

Realizing the insanity of this decision; I have set about making the best of it.

Understand this: When it comes to winning battles and influencing Allies, these men and women DO NOT F*** AROUND.


Cost to taxpayers? ZERO. NADA. ZILCH. BUPKISS.

In Bravo 2, we've organized, we're efficient, and we're the poo - so take a big whiff you Spanish, paella gulping, Hijos e hijas de los cerdos del mal. * yea, I have no idea what that means either.

My platoon gets mad supplies, based on their needs and their own personal production. In addition to their commune-based supplies; we've organized and they receive tanks from the work of my secret underground factories. Ok, not so secret, 'cause anyone can see - BUT DAMN IT THEY'RE FREAKING COOL AND MY WORKERS MAKE A BUTT LOAD OF TANKS.


These are Pakistani Tanks. Images of actual eUSMC tanks are forbidden by OPSEC - so blow me.

No secret IRC meetings. No sucking Emerick or any other Pfeiffer'ish / Congressional phallic regions. We work the game, and make it work for us without tipping our hats to The Man...uh, man.


If Benedict Arnold had IRC to kiss the sweaty tip of King George's Prince-maker...he would totally have used it.

Reverse donations of RM's back from the Platoon to reduce the cost of tanks produced are making it possible to supply additional Marines...every one of whom deals death like a vampire at a blood drive.


eUS Mil supply air fleet readies for takeoff.

Those who say that you have to suck on the guv'ment teat to max your damage is wrong. You're as wrong as a pregnant nun in the first pew, bee-atch.

What it takes is communication, cooperation, loyalty and the understanding that victory means ALL OF US TOGETHER.

That's how Fitty does it, That's how Bravo 2 does it, that's how America does it.


Marines always provide uniforms appropriate for any situation.

Are you badass enough, loyal enough, selfless enough to be a part of the most magnificent fighting force in the New World? If so, learn about the eUnited States Marine Corps.

If not, join the USAF...they'll take anyone, and you can get shit without doing anything.


eUSAF Amphibious training. Speedo's are required for participation.

07,

Lt. Fitisin