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You are reading an article written by a citizen of eRepublik, an immersive multiplayer strategy game based on real life countries. Create your own character and help your country achieve its glory while establishing yourself as a war hero, renowned publisher or finance guru.

Screw It. Again.

Day 1,646, 19:34 • Published in USA USA

• by Molly Emma

Screw It, I'm Running For Congress
Day 1646
5/23/2012

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MINOT, ND — After spending MINUTES considering it in my office at Fed Headquarters, I can no longer resist the urge.

Screw it.

My fellow Americans, I am sick and tired of not being in Congress. For months I have sat idly by as others experienced the joys of debating and interacting on behalf of the people of this great nation. I simply cannot take it any more! I have to get into Congress. I just have to.

It is with a great sense of relief that I say to all of you today, “Screw it. I'm in.”

No longer will I have to endure watching other candidates engaging in single-pump handshakes with voters, as I use every last ounce of restraint not to shout, "No! Warm double-clasp! Warm double-clasp!" **SIGH** eAmerica deserves someone who can do it right.

Doing it right. For America.

Seeing so many campaign articles for other candidates really got me thinking. Supporting other candidates already on the campaign trail and the fact that I was already wearing my brand new pantsuit was an added motivator.

Dressed and ready to GO!

From pushing healthcare legislation for the DoI, to working with politicians from across the aisle, to brokering international peace treaties with foreign dignitaries, I goddamn love being in ePolitics! For too long has this nation been deprived of a Molly Emma candidacy, and for too long have I been deprived of being in Congress.

Oh. And the applause. I look forward to the endless roar of applause perhaps most of all!

Aaaahh. That’s the stuff.

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VOTE MOLLY EMMA in NORTH DAKOTA on the 25th!!