[POTUS] Candor: The FULL RESOURCES 10/10 candidate

Day 1,897, 19:41 • Published in USA USA • by Candor

Pants Administration Application

Dear America.

It is with great joy that I announce that I will be making an announcement.

At this time, we will commence with the announcing. Thank you for your patience.


Av Khan (WTP Member) has accepted the post of Chief of Staff. As Chief of Staff, Av Khan will be assisting in every function of this administration and government.

If I am at anytime unreachable, the CoS will be my personal go-to guy and contact point.

Av Khan is someone I trust completely, he's extremely active, and he's available at times when I'm not, since he lives half way around the real world. At times when both I and the Vice President are out of touch, the Chief of Staff will be the nation's lead Executive officer.

Congratulations Av Khan, we're lucky to have you.




I have decided, in the name of stiff pants, to become the Dictator of America.

To that end, I will have many secretaries under me, whom will take dictation from me.

Those secretaries will reach out to other secretaries who will take dictation from them, and so forth.

If you would like to get in the line up of secretaries, you should apply now.

Pants Administration Application



And while we are announcing announcements...

Dictator-Elect Candor has created The Independent Office of Public Information.

Led by a Pubilc Information Officer, or PIO for short, this PIO will have Cabinet access but will be completely independent of The Executive and staff. The PIO will be charged with the independent dissemination of information to the nation as this person deems both safe with regards to national security, and necessary for the freedom of information in a democratic society.

This person, once appointed, can be removed from office only by a 2/3 vote of the nations mechanically elected Congress, for reason of intentional grievous harm to the nation via the release of national security related information.

If you have questions on the operations of The Executive and can't get them answered through other channels, this person will also act as the citizens ombudsman for information access.

The position has been offered to the nations most qualified individual, and we will announce the new PIO as soon as possible.

I have another announcement which will be announced henceforth.



I have sent letters to the governments of Canada and Mexico and threatened both with utter annihilation unless they surrender immediately the regions of our choosing.

In exchange for this surrender of regions, we will be sending pants to both our neighbors. And maybe Texas, since they for years have not wanted to be Americans anyway.



Now, for the ten of you who will be voting for my Dictatorship, I shall make one further announcement at this time, henceforth to be known as the “Candor Doctrine”.

Although, like a Doctor, I am a patient man, the medicine this nation requires must be applied with all due haste. To that end, I have recalled all haste to my office for a swift discussion of rapidity.

Such decisive action will be the hallmark of my Administration.

And now an Administration announcement:



Jarred Brown has been selected to be the next Ambassador to Mexico. Please welcome him with open arms and know that he comes highly qualified to be our Mexican Ambassador due to his two years of High School Spanish.

Pants Administration Application

We have filled the following positions:

Vice President (TBA)
Secretary of State (TBA)
Secretary of the Interior (TBA)
Secretary of the Treasury (TBA)
Secretary of Media (TBA)

I could tell you now, but I'd rather you vote for me, not for them. Still, I'll probably release more names as the date approaches. I have to fill another two or three articles and what not between now and the 5th.

I suppose one will have to be semi serious. Which by the way I can do on a dime, they just bore me as much as they do most of you. Boring is boring. You'll notice most all of my Presidency articles will be (see what I did there?) at least mildly humorous. We're playing a game here last I checked.

I'm am running for pretend President of a fake country and all.



Anyway, in addition, three "Adviser" positions within the Cabinet have been filled. Those are your typical ex-Presidents etc. Lots of them running around on the eForums without much positive to contribute, a guy needs to provide them some retirement security. Respect one's elders. Throw them some cheese. etc, etc.





Today we also announce the creation of two new positions, that of Liaison to the eForum Congress, and that of Liaison to the AFA Forum Congress. Both positions have yet to be filled.

Congress will be treated as two separate Houses, and legislation pursued in both bodies. Maybe they can flip a coin or something and decide who gets to be the "House", and who gets to be the "Senate".



Previously we announced that pop George will be the Personal Press Secretary to the President.

Oh, and Style of Roman (Cannon Cockers XO) has been appointed as Special Assistant to the President.

And lest I forget Yenchizzle has been appointed Special Deputy Undersecretary for Secondary Appropriations and Investments. He will report directly to the Deputy Secretary of Education.

Gaylord Q. Tinkledink has been appointed Sargent Master General of Important People. Mr. Tinkledink will report to the Special Deputy Undersecretary for Secondary Appropriations and Investments, who, again, reports to the Deputy Secretary of Education.

Would you prefer a funny flow chart?


funny flow chart

Now With Added Flow chart Thingy:

So you have The President > Vice President > Chief of Staff > Deputy Chief of Staff > Secretary of the Interior > Deputy Secretary of Education > Special Deputy Undersecretary for Secondary Appropriations and Investments > Sargent Master General of Important People > Important People > Less Important People > Not at all Important People > Important Foreign People > Less Important Foreign People > Not at all Important Foreign People > Pfeiffer (only a joke P).

See how that all works? Pretty simple when it's all written out.
Pants Administration Application

Further announcements will be preceded by announcement at a later date.

Thank you and good night.

Candor
American Dictator Elect
Respect the Pants