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Britain- It is just like a game of good old Risk

Day 1,337, 01:38 • Published in United Kingdom

• by Citizen 4945322

With Britain playing a classic pincer movement strategy in Canada, taking one country and then moving on to the next one, Ireland lay waiting and new it was their time to bounce back from the grave, like a zombie on a trampoline. With their population dropping like flies, we were celebrating how we had wiped the Irish off the map. And then Bang! Bang! Bang! Three places,Dublin, Cork and Shannon in Ireland, were handed over without much of a fight, although well done to all the soldiers who fought bravely trying in vain to quell the Terminator Salvation-esque resistance.

It is thought that Liam Neeson played an important part in not only helping the resistance, but destroying the Sith. He just needed Ewan MacGregor, whos Scottish/British so better, to finish the job. Sit Down, Ireland!

Although we lost Prince Edward Island to the Canadians whilst we were busy attacking the French Speaking land of Quebec, it wasn't much of a loss. We are now in the process of fighting to take it back. If you would like to fight here is a link to save you some time. Then we took the fine land of Ontario. "Where next?" I hear you say. Well, once we have regained Prince Edward Island we must wait on the Americans providing us with a route through them, as we do not want to upset the order of things by attacking Spain or Poland.

Ah, good old Risk. Never a proper game unless you leave in frustration at the end. Long Story short. I flipped the board and all the pieces fell off.

Our next move should be to quell the Irish Resistance, take back those areas they have taken and hold on to what we have at the moment, until an opportunity to extend our land presents itself. Meanwhile, China has been rapidly shrinking. (Warning: Family Guy Cutaway Incoming) Serbia, Hungary and Poland's conquest to take China has been easier than finding your brother in a crowd of Chinese people.

"Insert Cutaway Joke here."

Although Hubei hasn't been conquered yet, like my psychic predictions foretold, I believe that it is on the front-line and that an attack is imminent.