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Dateline: 27 May, 2016 (Day 3,111), 10:25PM EST

Location: James S. Brady Press Room, The White House


Today’s WHPR Contents:

1. Congressional Elections

2. USAF Newsletter

3. eUS Media Gems

Credits: J.A. Lake


Congressional Elections
_{J.A. Lake}


The Top 5 Parties held their Congressional elections on Wednesday, with a total of 482 voters working their way to the polls, a total voter turnout of 21%.

With 24.9% of the vote (120 votes), the Federalist Party secured 15 Congressional seats. Their delegation is:

1. Molly Emma
2. Orikfricai
3. Paul Proteus
4. Illiguy
5. AlexJ1890
6. Cromstar
7. Dinnyin
8. Evry
9. Tenshibo
10. shadowber
11. Aramec
12. Yui MHCP001
13. Ray of Sunshine
14. PimpDollaz
15. Hale Kane

When reached to for comment on the Federalist’s performance in the election, Party President Tenshibo sai😛

“The Federalist Party has a simple agenda this term, like all terms - progress through responsible leadership. We will, as always, continue to discuss all things such that the outcome is one that is favorable to the country as a whole.”

In a close second with 23.2% of the vote (112 votes), the Socialist Freedom Party secured 14 seats in Congress. Their delegation is:

1. Ilene Dover
2. J.A. Lake
3. Wooky Jack
4. Azazel Romanov
5. Shiloh13
6. Franklin Stone
7. Waysted
8. EddieA
9. SpitfireYG
10. George Armstrong Custer
11. GonzoVeritas
12. MyNameIsFrancis
13. Stef40
14. EdgarFigaro

When reached for comment, SFP PP Wooky Jack sai😛

“It is easy enough to say that man is immortal simply because he will endure: that when the last dingdong of doom has clanged and faded from the last worthless rock hanging tideless in the last red and dying evening, that even then there will still be one more soun😛 that of his puny inexhaustible voice, still talking. We (the SFP) are still talking. See you in Congress.”

As a bonus, the Socialist Freedom Party teamed up with long-time friends in the Old Farts United Party and sent George Armstrong Custer to Congress to represent them. When asked about the goals of his one-man delegation, Custer responde😛

“Since it's inception, the OhFU has been represented in nearly every session of Congress, as a ‘sixth party’ (now ranked eleventh) guest candidate on a Top 5 roster. I tend to be a voice of reason, often bringing Discussion threads back on topic.”

Third place went to the United States Workers’ Party, with 18.8% of the vote (91 votes). Their delegation is:

1. SColbert
2. Henry Pfeiffer Arundel
3. Andy Dufresne
4. Antonio Wimer
5. GoalieBCSC
6. Avruch
7. Derphoof
8. Inwegen
9. Cerb
10. WildOwl
11. Animis

Party President Andy Dufresne had this to say:

“The USWP is bringing an experienced team of Congressman into this month and we look forward to the building a better country.”

Coming in fourth was The Black Sheep Party, with 17.6% of the vote (85 votes). Their delegation is:

1. Henry William French
2. Arrden
3. jadiv
4. Bob Boudahili
5. Supernana
6. Captain Black Sheep
7. synhro
8. JohnKennedy
9. what4
10. Resoula

Party President Resoula responded to requests for comment with this:

“As usual TBSP's goal is to get taxes lowered. With companies being able to be placed soon we wish to convince congress that a lower tax rate is better. Not just for the initial landing "backstab" that USWP and the Feds are supporting, since companies CAN still be moved after the initial placement. We want people to WANT to place their companies here and leave them here by getting the other parties to agree to a reasonable tax rate for the first time in forever.”

Rounding out the Top 5 Political Parties is We The People, pulling in 15.3% of the vote with 74 votes. Their delegation is:

1. rainy sunday
2. Hale26
3. Cubby
4. Oblige
5. The Mike
6. Thalio Voss
7. Comet Academy
8. Blande
9. Senryaku

We The People Party President rainy sunday could not be reached for comment.

From the combative to the poetic, the political parties of the eUnited States are prepared for the coming month in Congress. It promises to be an eventful one, too, with the waning blacklist discussions and the waxing tax discussions converging in June. We shall seek to keep you, the people, informed on developments as they occur.


USAF Newsletter
_{J.A. Lake}

One of the best newspapers regularly published today- one that actually focuses on news, no less- is the USAF Newsletter. A perusal of the media released by our sister government publication reveals a deftly assembled newsletter, which is to be expected from master newspaperman George Armstrong Custer. It cannot be overstated how highly we at the White House Press Release recommend reading the USAF Newsletter.

Custer was kind enough to provide us with the link to the most recent edition, as well as a short description of its contents:

USAF Weekend Newsletter
www.erepublik.com/en/article/2599173/1/20
Congress To Vote on 1% Tax
USAF Cancels Q8 Tank Order
Recipe for Success: Teamwork

"There's really only so much strictly-USAF news to be had, so I'm trying to build a broader audience by redeveloping the Newsletter as a full spectrum news source, on par with the WHPR, as befitting one of our government's top official newspapers," says editor Custer on the expanded scope of the Newsletter.


eUS Media Gems
_{J.A. Lake}


Browsing the eUS media for non-governmental publications of note since our last issue, we have found some good materials to share with you, the people.

First up, an excellent piece of writing with regards to the resource wars entitled Resource Wars II - Day 3110 - Drifting…, penned by our own Ilene Dover.

Next, an interesting exploration of the Socialist Freedom Party’s constitution in A Constitutional Inquiry, out of Phoenix Quinn’s Player’s Quarterly.

Our President Tyler Bubblar published a mini-autobiography Nearing Journey’s End discussing his past, our present, and the future of the eUnited States.




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