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Dreams. Fragile dreams? They almost always are.



Once in a while, you meet people who become extremely important to your ordinary life. With whom you can share your secrets, thoughts, free time, energy etc. You even dream about them since telepathic connection between your two minds exists. Few nights ago, the girl I was attached to appeared in my dream, sitting on a chair in an empty grey room. She was quiet and still, starring at one point on the wall. We used to be close and in my dream I felt her loneliness. Few years ago, after a very tough argument and even some insults, I parted ways with, back then, my best friend. Didn’t hear anything about him for something like 2 years. Then one night, I dreamt a funeral. And the buried was his mother. The dream was quite shocking, so in the morning I asked my other friend if he knows something about him and his family. Then he said that mother of this guy really died a day before my dream about her funeral. My ex girlfriend once dreamt which 2 questions will I draw in an exam. The chances were pretty odd, had to guess 2 of 32... I believe that everyone agrees how strange this was.



So, there are people we communicate with almost on supernatural levels. What happens when one such a person abandons us, betrays us, or lets us down? Depending on situation, you usually feel either grief or hate. In most cases, grief is a pioneer. Questioning yourself what went wrong, could you prevent it somehow, trying to reach that person and sort things out... all those tactics just to return the part of your being, no matter if it’s somewhat broken. Sometimes, this turns out to be successful and you become ok with that person, receive another chance. But in most cases, when things escalate, the empathic (and sometimes physical) connection is simply lost. So a feel of grief and loneliness remains even after ,,signing a truce’’ with him/her. Not to mention what happens in the same scenario but when you stay separated, without a chance to fix things. The grief is a strong and weak feeling at the same time. Why strong? Because it enlightens people, makes them better aware of themselves, of their life and wishes. Though it’s passive which is its weak side. You just can’t move on once when it strikes your consciousness. Biologists know what ,,being sessile’’ means. Well, you are not literally, but emotionally sessile in these situations.



A turbulent period, the one when your body and ,,soul’’ want to move on, follows it. You start fighting the feeling of sadness. During the two opposite periods, people are usually insensitive: either do not hear or feel others (grief), or feel but do not give a f*** about others (hate). However, during the transition period, people are extremely vulnerable because 2 parts of them collide – the passive and the active one. They act strangely and do weird things. For example, when this happens, they are easy to talk into something. However, as in wars, the winner takes it all. And usually the active side wins, the one that wants to live and move on at all costs.



,,There's a thin line between love and hate?''

Then... then comes the third phase which resembles a hate and anger. You hate, not just the one who hurt you, but, instead, berserk everyone and everything around with your ill thoughts and behavior. Your spirit desperately wants the missing part back while circumstances are making this impossible. This is a state of high mental energy, the state of untouchable mind which now has a power to do and think of absolutely anything. However, just like every other high energy state, this one doesn’t last for long. A furious hate turns into an ordinary concentrated hate (aimed only at that one specific person) or even into acceptance, you become indifferent towards that person.

Note that clarification is needed here: there are at least two distinct types of hate. The first one is when you loved someone in the first place and then started hating him/her because of something (your subconsciousness still hopes that you can sort things out with that person), and the second one is when you hate someone you never loved or felt sympathy for (your aim is to destroy that person) - it simply annoys you. Here I talk about the first case.

Member the time when you were chill and happy?



Unfortunately, these important persons you lose and the effect those events make is cumulative. After some time, everyone seems negligible in your life. The trust in humanity and others has been lost; there is no hope or idea you can rely on; there is no someone who can enlightens you and returns the joy to your life. But can you do it on your own? Can you find your inner strength and regenerate even after 1000 fails? I bet everyone can, less or more successful. Just... never give up and an unexpected reward will surely come sooner or later.

And, to avoid a deletion of this article, there's one more paragraph dedicated to our neighbors. Member Lemuri... sorry, Croatia? Here's one song for them. I'm sure they can read between the lines...