The Real Reason for the UK Invasion

Day 1,341, 22:30 • Published in Canada United Kingdom • by Leo Balzac

Comrades, today I bring to you some frightening news. Today, I have learned the true reason for the UK's invasion of Canada. They came not for our deer, but for our Breadfish!



It is true, if the one known as Jamesw had his way, all of eUK would be feasting upon one of Canada's most glorious creatures. “That doesn't sound so bad” is what you might be thinking, but you'd be wrong. Not only is the Breadfish one of Canada's most precious resources, but it is also one of our delicacies. You see, in the UK, when someone gets their hands on a freshly fried (it is always fried) fillet of Breadfish, they do not top it with butter, or perhaps vinegar; oh no, they turn it into a curry. Truth be told, I have nothing against curry, I quite like it, but I will not abide Breadfish in curry!




“What the hell is his deal?!” Yes, I know what you're thinking. “Leo's gone off the deep end for good.” No. I have not. You see, the Breadfish has a very large yet very secretive role in the founding and growth of our fair land. Like the Beaver, the Breadfish was caught for it's beautifully formed gills, processed and then shipped back across the Atlantic to Europe to be turned into a resin which was used to help secure ladies undergarments. Other uses for powdered Breadfish gill at this time was as a fertility drug for men.

By 1910, the Breadfish had been hunted to exhaustion. It's population had been dangerously reduced, it's natural habitat poisoned by the effluence coming from the processing plants. It was at this time, a group of concerned citizens stepped forward and saved the Breadfish. How, we are not quite sure but hell, they did it.

Only recently have the Breadfish stocks been rehabilitated enough to allow a resumption of the Breadfish Harvest. The UK came at this time for this reason, to STEAL our Breadfish. This will not be allowed to come to pass. Working together, as a community has saved us and our marvelous Breadfish (it's like an inverse sandwich) for the time being. Only by continuing to work together will we achieve final victory.



To help keep this country working together, on the 25th vote for an active congress, vote for Balzac in PEI.


TL😉R
Breadfish are awesome
The British want our Breadfish
Vote to keep the Breadfish
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