eJapan, eCuba, and Chaos! Oh my!
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by Logan Hyrozek
Sometimes I get the impression that the world is anti-American. What has made me consider such a ludicrous idea are the constant uprisings from eJapan and eCuba. There should be a summit of sorts to decide on who to face this problem, without sacrificing territory. If they actually expect us to just give in time after time again, they have another thing coming. I'm quite sure there's some kind of compromise they would be open to, which would involve permanent American occupation.
"But we don't like 'Murica!" Says the outside world. To them, we say: "Oh, don't worry, you're next on our list.". Hopefully the day comes when eFrance gets that in their heads. Hopefully we can keep up our defense in Pays de la Loire long enough for us to fantasize our conquering of Paris. And then we put every mime against a wall and then we go "pew pew". Graphic as that would be, it would also be a necessary evil.
From recent shadow polls taken recently, it seems that Haruhiism should become the next official religion of eUSA. So next time you see an alien try to kidnap you, remember to pray to an all-powerful Japanese high school girl for strength. Now comes the decision of whether to actually campaign this. I call dibs on being the Pope, and anyone who wants to get involved can be the Arch-Bishop (for those uninformed of Haruhiism, please watch the Melancholy of Haruhii Suzumiya. At least if you're a fan of anime).
On a leaving note, things are slowly rising back to the fun chaotic state that they always should be. While their aren't as many drastically ambitious ideas floating around with this, (it would actually be nice to know if anyone is fighting for anything but imperialism) it's still a step-up. If I recall, there's an article on Uncyclopedia about Haruhiism that explains things fairly easily. It might be a good idea to check that out.
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V
I put my finger where?
I declare thou an Arch-Bishop!
(If thou wants to be)
🙂
Fuck murrika
But fuck anime even more, fatties
I love this rhetoric. But, it's not, just, an American problem. The worlds fattest kid, ever, was a Russian. An estimated 2.1 billion people are overweight.
I was more aiming at anime fans being fat than Americans in general (although they are). I myself am overweight as well though, I actually weigh 220lbs. But I'm also 6'4 and at 10% bodyfat. #yolo #eatbigtogetbig #beachbody #lightweight #nothingbutapeanut #imzyzzbrah
That's not a bad weight ratio, in my opinion. (Then again, I am an American.) Peanut butter is good shit. More protein in two tablespoons than a 16 ounce steak.
I get the impression the world is upside down and America is right side up.
America does not stand for any thing that has value, or does it?
What is wrong with America it depends on what lens your looking in.
Come to America get rich get fat look at the rest of the world and wonder what their problem is.
The country that gives more to aliens then to its own citizens.
Need a break? Come to America We are home of the Brave, home of everybody else...