Join the new world

Ladies, Gentlemen, Oldfags, Newfags and Harry, I’d like to take a bit of your precious time away from you, to get you to sit down and read a lovely little article about what I expect to see from the latest installment of the National Military, which I refuse to refer to as anything but Federalised United Kingdom Units, F-U-K-U for short. Obviously, from the get go I expect to see it having a positive, yet cost effective way of improving our damage output and coordination. After 6 months or so in cabinet seeing continuous improvements in fighting cheap, fun wars I expect to see this improve even further. As I keep repeating to feed my ego, my 2 terms as MoF saw a minimal change in the treasury value, despite the intense wars fought in this time. Blue and Evil, Jimbojoy and Ayame Crocodile all had excellent management and success, though from my personal opinion we relied a lot on the generosity and impressive performances from private citizens during this time. Ultimately, an ideal world would lead to us eliminating how much we rely on tanks and generous private unit supplies whilst keeping our treasury intact.

The eUK weighs in on what they think about my opinion

Being a lucky resident of Manchester, we have many people pass through on their way up to the more desolate areas of the North, such as York. One of those people was His Majesty, King Woldy I/II/III, who accompanied me to the pub. Along with stares of passionate romance and longing, Woldy shared with me some ideas of how he wanted his term to go, should he win and thus was I first introduced to his F-U-K-U plan. Obviously, with Wayne running Woldy didn’t expect to win and could propose whatever he wanted. Hence he went ahead and gave out a plan that I agree with in principle, but not necessarily the execution.

Candid images of Woldy and Butjam meeting outside the train station

Now, the way I see it, it’s great to be rewarding units for their excellence and all that, but it doesn’t feel like the criteria has entirely worked out. To qualify for payment, you need at least 50% of your members be active fighters. To me, that sounds like it should be pretty easy if you’re motivating members to fight and removing inactives from the unit. According to Cyg’s articles (The first of which, here) only 2/10 of the top units didn’t manage that yesterday. That would mean 8/10 top units would’ve been rewarded full compensation, with the other two only being restricted to half. I’ll admit, the data is a little patchy, it’s a snapshot from a day where the system wasn’t active and certainly not reliable data (remembering the difference between reliable and accurate, Talon will be proud). But it still means that’s a big chunk of money, even if we failed, which is the second half of my point. In tracking only the number of fighters and not the actual damage direction, you haven’t really given an incentive to commanders and captains to arrange DO’s and strikes to achieve success, you’ve just asked them to try and get half of their members to fight.

“Butjam, shut up being a whiny little bastard and go back to playing Messiah on IRC if you’re not going to do anything useful!” ring the cries, fortunately I’ve actually come prepared with a simple solution for this. Simply adopt this formula:

Payment=FightersxSuccess?xActivity?xBase

Payment: Fairly self explanatory, the final amount awarded to the unit
Fighters: Once again, p obvious, the number of fighters registered that day
Success?: The first of the changes I’d like to see. Before F-U-K-U is used, the MoD should arrange a goal/target for the day, which is then presented to the general staff. From something as simple as “Win this campaign” to “Achieve x points” in a battle that we know we cannot win outright, but drag out painfully for the opposing side. If this is met, the value is 1. If not, 0.5 is used.
Activity?: Exactly the same as the current one, if it is below the threshold then apply a modifier of 0.5, if it is above then just use 1. I would however promote the increase to 70% of the members being active fighters for the day.

All in all, a unit who presents less than 70% of it’s members as fighters on a day where we are unsuccessful will only receive a quarter of the payment per fighter. Although this may seem cruel and a bit of a dick move, I would like to point out that F-U-K-U should exist as incentives, not free payments. From these 2 simple changes I would hope:


It’s been a while and I’ve used a lot of words, let’s just calm down with a puppy break before we continue, ‘eh?

1. Commanders and leaders within large military units, the ones most likely to utilise large commune systems would consider ‘trimming the fat’, so to speak from their units. By being pushed to reach 70% when called for, I hope to see a greater pressure exerted on inactive members/commune abusers to be forced into fighting or to leave the unit.This would reduce the burden on the system as a whole whilst increasing the capability of the unit to look after newer, more active military participants who may otherwise miss out.

2. All captains, commanders and the like would be encouraged to not only make sure there is activity, but also that it is directed intelligently and well organised. When failure causes a halving of the payout, there is an incentive to be active, push people to #MoD and reach for our target, not just reminding people to fight at least once.

3. To prevent simply throwing money at units, causing the F-U-K-U scheme to either die out or simply only to be fully utilised when the MM presents a windfall and we can splash out a bit, and instead cause it to be a more cost effective way to win battles whilst primarily benefitting UK citizens. I love working with people from other countries on here, it’s one of the best parts of the game and one of the only reasons why the military module offers some fun. However, recent events show us that the guys you were supplying one day (indirectly helping their rankings and funding etc.) may be up against you only a few weeks down the line. We can look to making the eUK stronger, more fun and more....medally if we can encourage our citizens this way

4. Finally, to make the CP and his MoD think. As I mentioned, the aims for the day can be very simple, or they can be more complex. At any rate, a strategy must be thought of prior to a day of action, making provisions for flexibility throughout the day. Tactically, we rely on these two people to guide us during war (Which is why I’m still in #MoD, despite the constant pinging <_ we deserve to know that if they have authorised expenditure a solid plan back it up.>
So, my friends, there we have it. A simple solution for improving what we get out of our system. For those of you who require tl;dr

Make it more difficult for units to get the full payout from the MoD in the F-U-K-U scheme, to improve tactics, activity, cost effectiveness and the military of the eUnited Kingdom as a whole.

To those of you about to hate the suggestions I made, 2 things.

and, of course
FUK U

Until next time,
Your friendly neighbourhood saviour/great kisser
Butjam xxx ❤