What 1 Change should Plato Make with his Wad of Dough

Day 2,006, 18:47 • Published in USA USA • by Jackson Cousteau

I do not care to make a fancy banner for my paper.

I am always reading other people's papers and everyone has a fancy banner. If I made a banner for my paper, it would look stupid.

So it dawned on me after reading this newspaper story:
Genius Philosopher Rakes Dough - Writing Competition by the mighty Gnilraps. (When oh when will you PLEEEEESE run for Country President?)

What Plato (who is actually Aristotle, read Gnil's paper), needs to introduce with all of his freshly earned Samolians is to develop a "Newspaper Banner Generator".

It would be totally cool because I could have a banner for my paper. And some of you whose banners are very lame could upgrade your banner generator to Q5 and have something nice finally.

Here's what to expect:


For 10 Gold you get a Q1 Banner Generator. Here is my newspaper's banner in Q1

Not bad. I could do better, I think, but probably not much, and for 10 Gold it would save me 10 minutes of work. I could use that time to click the fight button.


For an additional 20 Gold (Protip: wait for the 44% off sale) you get

Color!

The next upgrade to

Get's you a huge improvement in design and quality. This isn't something your average screwball is capable of designing. My paper would look like this:

That's friggin' hot.

But if you want even more customization, I recommend

Be one of the elite (N.B. I am not saying "elitist") eCitizens whose newspaper banner INCLUDES YOUR NAME!!!

Now you can see why I am calling this a "game improvement".

If you are a goldbeast, you will probably want to jump on the
Banner Generator.

This upgrade takes into account the style of your writing, the nuances of your character name, the frequency with which you publish, and it runs an algorithm on your friends list to estimate what your potential readers would most like to see.

The Gold is a lot, I know, but holy moly will you LOVE what this baby does.

And so without further ado, I bring you my eRep Newspaper Banner as made by Plato's fantastic Q5 Generator:



Oh.

Maybe check back tomorrow to see if it is working yet.

I'll see you next time,

Under eSea