Soliloquoy

Day 881, 08:24 • Published in Hungary Hungary • by acerola

Soliloquoy

I am Quicksilver. You all know me. You may not love me or appreciate my doings, but still I created waves in this e-life that nobody can deny to me. I did them mostly for my country, eHungary, to myself, and for eRepublik itself. Because I love this game, I love the people in it. Some more, some less, some not at all, but that is life. I am not telling it to boast or make me look better than I am - I am telling it because I steadfastly refuse to be portrayed as a criminal, who only ever criticized and scolded admins or the game - it is not my true picture, not my true being. My true being is not blameless, not perfect, but not evil either, not a criminal.

I made mistakes, even sins here. I am aware of that. I was misunderstood by many, because I did not understand that criticism is something that many people do not want or like to hear, so they interpret them as insults or attacks. I also made a mistake of not being more careful with my tone, the mood of my criticism, that in this way hurt others. I also made a mistake of getting angry when I perceived unfairness and injustice, and in anger, I said real insults. I apologized for them, and I freely do so now again, because they were not right, not fair. I got quite severly punished for these too, which I suppose is annulling them... I hope. My sins are surely not so serious that deserve a punishment forever...

I also promise - without conditions - that in the future I will make my best not to repeat these mistakes. I am who I am, and that means I will always be outspoken and if I have an opinion I will voice it - but I will try to think twice before writing it down so as not to be insulting or attacking. I am aware of the fact that I will be closely watched and probably misinterpreted too again... I cannot really help that. I can only change MY ways - others must change theirs if they can.

But I am, and I will always remain Quicksilver. I am taking the part of the blame that belongs to me. I am letting hate and enemity go. I only want to play.

I can change.

I have changed.

Quicksilver

P.s.
No, this article has no particular reason to be written now. I had a long, hard talk with a friend, who made me think about a lot of things. It started something in me which culminated in this article. That's all. But I mean it.


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