Relic's eUK post

Relic's War Journal: Nostalgia for the Past

9 • Day 790, 14:25 •

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Before the actual article, I'd like to write a brief background.

Somewhere around October - November 2008th, I started writing articles that followed actions of eUK paratroopers, of course it'd be wayyyyy too boring if it talked about how many damage how many damage did Dishmcds do while we were asleep. Get my point ? Well it's a fiction article, as if the main character is really involved in the war/eLife. I usually focused on main character's thoughts, feelings, etc.. None of the characters are fictional and all of them WERE in the eUK military at the time I actually wrote it. Article usually covered only one day of eLife. After few articles, I stopped writing for several reasons. First of all I ran for presidency, meaning I didn't participate in actions of eUK Paratroopers, Second: after elections I moved away to eCroatia and yet again it meant I didn't participate in actions of eUK paratroopers.

I'd like to thank to Tim09, who checked my grammar ( which was bad, since I am not a native English speaker ) and published my articles in his Newspapers. I'd like to thank to Cheeseball too, who did all that when Tim09 was not here and last, but certainly not least, Hassan, who checked my grammar when both of them were unable to help me with my grammar. 

Some previous articles:

Relic's War Journal: Part 1
Relic's War Journal: Part 2
Beware the Sniper ! !
War in Argentina ?
Para's Plight

This is the sixth part in a series documenting Relic's time as a Paratrooper,
by Relic

“YOU LAZY SOD! GET UP ALREADY, IT'S WAY PAST LUNCH TIME!”
Ain't the best wakening I've had in my life, but Manic Eskimo always did stuff very effectively. No matter how much my ears complained, I had to give him a credit for being effective.
“OI! It's work time now! GET UP!” he shouted hard and I didn’t notice any signs of him stopping anytime soon, so I decided to respond to his shouts:
“All right, all right, easy; my head's 'bout to explode for god sake.”
-”If you hadn’t drunk all that alcohol last night, we'd be working on starting up our Party again by now”
-”Yeah, yeah, blame it all on me... Do you know how hard I've worked to protect Svoboda from a take over? “
-”Obviously not hard enough” - as much as I disliked the comment, he had a point; our communist party in eCzech Republic got taken over. Ironic thing is that Svoboda was accused of taking over eCzech republic and obviously the best way to avoid that was taking over Svoboda? I never thought I'd be accused of takeover tries, after all my anti-takeover propaganda, how ironic!
-”So, are you going to get out of the bed anything soon?” - He was really fired up, bugging me this early in morning, typical British.
-”What time is it at? “
“Around 2-3 PM, I believe”
Hell, I never thought it was that late, I guess it's better to get up and actually sober up, grab a meal.
-”Oh, and ....” He started talking while I was putting my black T-shirt on “Don't know how to put this, but...” - Yeah ? ““- eUK was invaded during the morning “ - At just hearing eUK and invading in same sentence, I got really nervous. I knew they don't have a habit to attack, so it meant they got attacked. Imperialism just isn't eUK’s style.
“- By whom ? “
“ Poland and Spain, they're expecting Swedes to attack soon, too “
-”Darn, I'll fresh up and I'll meet you at the office in 30 minutes, 'kay ?”
“ Sure thing, I'll meet you there!”

As much as I was familiar with eUK, I didn't like the idea of them being conquered by Poles, nor Spaniard, not to mention Swedes. I went to the bathroom to freshen up; afterwards I went to grab something from my fridge to eat. I only had Cornflakes and beer. I guess we've all experienced that feeling when you decide to change something in your life, but the next morning you remember what you said, but really nothing had changed. I popped the beer thinking of an old Croatian saying: “Klin se klinom izbija” Roughly translated: Fight fire with fire. Or in my case “Fight hangover with beer”! I sat down to look at the newspapers, they said: “eUK Invaded!” I already made peace with idea of eUK being overrun by filthy Poles, Spaniards or Swedes, but I recalled of my time in eUK paratroopers. I remember I kept a diary of those times and I believe it's kept safe somewhere in the closet. I put down my beer ( and yes, that’s possible with me and I believe this is the third time I've actually put down my beer while it still had some beer left in it ) and got up. I went to open my closet and find my diary, it was still there, really well kept. On the cover it said:

Relic's War Diaries
Who Dares Win
Qui audet adipiscitur 

Ah, yes, good old SAS slogan. I almost forgot about that. On the first page I wrote what to do if someone finds the diary. “ If lost, return to eUK Minister of Defence, address to Relic. If too lazy, follow the smell of beer, it shall take you right to me!” Ah yes, that, too... it really brought some memories back. Second page was reserved for my favourite quote that describes eUK Paratrooper's hard life. It was from VettigeSwa and it goes something like this: “Being a Paratrooper is being able to fight with a hangover.” Speaking of Vettige, I never got to cross over one entry in my diary. It seems that the guy who got shot long time ago wasn't Vettige, but some other bloke who stole all of his stuff, including his tags... Though I never realized why I have had mistaken him for that other paratrooper. No matter, it was time to call few of my friends from eUK, just to hear how they are and that usual sentimental crap that I care about whenever I remember my experience from eUK. Those experiences last forever, especially sharing fox holes and trenches with your dear comrades, with a little voice telling you that you should use every moment of your life there, because you never know when it could be your last... That feeling always follows you during the time of fighting, along with fear and expectation. Of course, I wouldn't be myself if I didn't miss the beer and the music while I was in the trenches and fox holes... Ah yes, sometimes those two are the only things that can pull your through toughest time. Well, I sat down at the table and took the phone. I didn't know who to call first, so I opened my Notebook filled with numbers from many eUK eCitizens, some long gone, some still active. First number I found was Anaxima's. I decided to skip her. Our relationship is too complicated to be dealt with right now, sometimes we can't stand each other, other times she’s good like a sister to me. Next number was GLaDOS'... Ah yes, fun guy, we had endless talks about point of capitalism ( I am happy to report, that in all the time we spent talking about that, we found no answer! ), how eWorld is ran by greed, etc. Usual political shite in which we both show a lot of interest. I decided to give him a ring...

"Hello ?"
"Oi, It's me "
"Relic ? Oh god, haven't talked to you in a long time"
"Yeah, listen, I called to see how are stuff there and how are you and how’s the war going on..."
"Well, I am fine, I guess, we're doing pretty good job, though I miss you, what do you say about coming here and fighting alongside your other ex comrades."
"ermmm..."

It really got me thinking, should I return and try to give my small contribution? I decided to accept his invitation, hell, I have time to fix eCzech political scene, eUK maybe won't be here in couple of days... but I knew that they wouldn't go down easy, but exactly the opposite, they'll give all they have! The only way my friends know!

"Sure, let’s do it for one last time, who knows when will be able to do it again!"
"Great, listen, I have to go now, I have some flame articles that I have to finish. Polandball isn't satisfied with my latest pictures, I have to make better ones!"
"Sure thing, whatever makes you happy, I'll catch the next plane to eUK... oh and... I kind of..."
"Lack money ? "
"Yeah, thats it... could you ..."
"Send some? Yeah, I guess I expected this from you, I'll wire some ASAP."
"Thanks, see you in couple of hours, I guess "

I hanged up the phone. I didn't know how to brake it to Manic, but I guess it's like taking off a bandage, the quicker you do it, the less it hurts... or was it the opposite ? Can't remember... Well whatever it is, I decided to finally get dressed up and go into Svoboda's Office.

While I was approaching the Office, I noticed some workers right in front of the office; they were kind of busy... Taking off some stupid sign that said ... wait, does that say Svoboda ?! Wait, what? Why? I was wondering why are they taking it off, I kind of restrained myself from shouting at those workers, but I assumed I'll get my explanation from Manic. As I entered the office Manic was pissed.

"Whats wrong ? - I asked
"Our new, “democraticly elected”, Party President decided to rename the party to Radical Lulz party!"
"Wait, what ? Lulz! Well anyways, I bring more bad news for you..."
"What now ?"
"Well, I am flying to eUK, theres a war there and all, you know they are my friends and I decided to assist them, We'll be in touch though. I am pretty sure we'll be able to raise the party again!"
"You always bring bad news ... Like Gandalf in Lord of the Rings..."
"Yeah, about that Manic, going out doesn't hurt you, nor your social life ..."
"Okay, whatever! When are you going ? "
"In couple of hours I guess. "
"OK, well, I keep you for your word. We'll keep in touch, OK ? "
"Yes, but now I really have to go. I am sorry, but I have to be there early enough to get a full night sleep..."
"Yeah, I understand. Tough I'll be hearing from you?"
Yeah... See ya!

I rushed back home, pissed about the name changing, to pack my bags and hit the road... or plane... depends how you take, I could also say hit the air. I mean! It doesn't matter really. I packed my bags and went to the Airport. I took my money from ATM, it's actually GLaDOS', but who cares? ( probably him, but certainly not me ! ) I paid for the ticket and in matter of hours I was in eUK. Checking in and all takes a while, longer then the actual trip to be honest.

A familiar scene was upon me, the eUK's military airport. But it was different than what I am use to. The snow seemed to have covered the most of it, but I assumed getting snow out of the way wasn't really the priority in this time of war. Since its war time, most traffic is re routed over the Military Airport, just to keep track of people coming and people going out of the country. Smart call by eUK MoD, whoever that is nowadays. As I was exiting the plane I noticed someone waiting just couple yards down. It was a good friend of mine, Hassan Pesaran, GLaDOS probably talked out that I agreed to come to eUK.

"-What are you doing here ?" - I asked
"-You know whats the moto of all paratroopers: Utrinque Paratus (Ready for anything) !" - he looked a bit disappointed though.
"Yeah, I guess I see what you mean, huh ? "
"Not even a Hello ?"
"Well, you did come unexpected ... Hello, I guess"
"Ah, didn't expect much more from ya, I assume. Lets sign you up in Ministry of Defence and then you can hit he sack and prepare for tomorrow."
"Sounds fair to me. Hows the war going on btw. ?"
"Good, we've shattered the first wave in South East England."
"Ah, splendid! If you thought I forgot about my Paratrooper manors, you are wrong. After we sign up, we'll go to some bar, I'll buy you a beer, with GLaDOS' money, of course."

Hassan helped me deal with papers and stuff. Afterwards we went to a bar, to get some beer, haven't had beer in 12 hours! Way too much! My hands started shaking! After that I just went to sleep and prepared myself for tomorrow, for day one... day one for the second time... With thoughts concentrating on tomorrow, It took me a while to fell asleep. That feeling again. The best word to describe it is Duty, Duty to live your life while you still can, mixed with fear and expectation of tomorrow... It's good to be back!

Thanks for reading