Re-Structuring the CAF? Wanna kill Troll Man? Call 1-800-DocOc! Toll FREE!

Day 658, 16:08 • Published in Canada Canada • by AugustusV
Article written by Octavian_F


WARNING: THIS ARTICLE IS EXTREMELY LONG, READER DISCRETION IS STRONGLY ADVISED. IF YOU HAVE ADD, TROUBLE READING, OR IF YOU ARE SIMPLY A TWO CLICKER, PARENTAL APPROVAL IS REQUIRED BEFORE READING THIS MATERIAL.

Please vote this up! This is a proposal and issue of national concern & a national debate! Unless you're a troll, in which case please leave your name and phone number down below, and we can arrange a later date when I can expose your nonsense and publicly humiliate you. Minimum waiting time to see the Doc is two weeks, so don't wait, book an appointment today! Thanks. 😉

The Introduction

Hello again! Great news! I have an idea! (OMG!)

But I know that some of you are probably saying: "An idea? You? Oh not again...Whos the God-Emperor this time a**h***?"

So my response is that yes, "unfortunately", I do have an idea (and yes I'm still gonna be an a**h**😉. But its a rather brilliant one I'd say, so please at try to contain yourself at least until done reading it, then you can go ahead and hate me down below in flame Octavian_F--- er I mean "comments section". Or leave your name and phone number. Both options are OK with me.

Anyway, as I was saying, when I was asking you all to elect me into congress, I made a few promises to sweeten the deal, and a few of those promises were on CAF reform. So here (as promised) is my idea on the so-called "CAF-Reform". Now I chose to write this as article instead of posting it for congress-only, because I don't want congress to vote for it, I want CANADA to vote for it (so please comment/criticize/suggest anything on your mind in the comments section below, or in case of uncalled-for, and/or idiotic comments/random flaming, please leave your name and phone number instead, and I'll get back to you at a later date), and thus maybe you can kindly help me fix some stuff if you see a few errors in my logic. Plus, most of congress hates me anyway... AND, although I'm a self-declared eCanadian eNationalist (it means I have a love affair with our nation, I tried to hide it, but at one point, the truth must come out), I'm clearly being more democratic than the so called "noble eCanadian eDemocrats", who run our nation with an iron (er I mean "democratic") fist (gentle hand?). And as an example, I've basically just opened a national referendum on this issue, as opposed to discussing it with my close-minded elitist colleagues. So please comment on it with suggestions, and then I can take this to congress and they'll basically be forced to vote it in (or else the iron fist of REAL DEMOCRACY will hit with unprecedented fury). And as congressman (and hopefully future Prime Minister if you deem me worthy of the task), I'll be doing a lot more of this. Just make a quick note of that before we move on.

The Motive

If you skipped the intro to get to this part...good choice. You didn't miss anything special.

Anyway this is what I like to refer to as "the serious part" (*gasp😉.

Now to give you a basic background of why the CAF needs to be redone, its because:

1. Its outdated.
2. Its barely funded, and never to the extend that it should be.
3. Its way more expensive than it should be to maintain, and the gov't can barely keep up (and usually doesn't).
4. The forums (yes, even the dam official CAF forums are an issue) are slow, and too "complicated", especially for two-clickers, which would be a great benefit to the Armed Forces if they can be encouraged to increase the two clicks, to a possible total of four.
5. Other countries have proved they have way better methods of organizing a national defense.
6. The CAF is so large, that it alienates everyone, and makes them feel like a mere statistic.

Must I go on? Fine.

7. Its command and/or general structure is flawed.
8. Its poorly managed. Not because the people managing it are not capable individuals, but because the system itself make it impossible to do so properly(see number 😎.
9. During the war with PEACE the CAF has clearly demonstrated that it needs a total makeover ASAP. And this point is only strengthened by the fact that so many resistance movements have popped up (to the great horror of the government), exactly because of this failure.
10. If the CAF wasn't such a failure, then we would never have any issues with the Canadian resistance movements, "serpartists", "terrorists", "those who stand in the way of Jacobi, WD, and all the other ministers serving for longer than one can remember", etc. Period.

So you see (hopefully), that the CAF REALLY needs some help in rebuilding its broken structure, and Doc Oc is here to fix that. However what I'm prescribing is actually more of a "transplant", than a fixer-upper, if you get what I'm saying. More of an "Over-haul" of the system, kinda like what Obama is doing in America with health-care, and yes of course that just like Obama, I'll have special people with special interests in congress who will probably strongly show their disgust at my plan. I'll just try to do my best to point them out later on so that you make sure you don't ever vote them again. Mkay? Oh and I'll be doing all this work, all the while trying to kill spider(troll) man. Tis a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it.


Octavian_F at work.

The Plan

If you made it this far, you're in for a treat, cause this is what I like to call (gasp here just for suspense), "The boring --er I mean the good part".

Now the plan is as follows:

First off, we split up the CAF into smaller parts, and privatize most of it. Now if Tyler F. Durden is reading this then this is probably his white dream, because I plan to create a series of smaller, elite, mercenary squads to take care of Canada's national defense. Yes that's right Tyler, sometimes the Doc also likes to dress up as Santa Claus and pretend its Christmas. And you've been a good little boy. But be careful, Santa also likes to leave dirty black coals for naughty little trolls, so be good little boys and girls, cause Santas' always watching. 😉

Ok now lets move on from the slightly disturbing content, and get back to the point:

Now in order for the CAF to be split up, its gonna fist have to be totally dissolved. I.e. shut down completely, discharge all its members, etc etc.

The armed forces of Canada would then be split into two sides, the government-funded divisions, and the area reserved for private contractors.

Government-Funded Army (Canadian Armed Forces)



I think that its the government's responsibility to fund all soldiers who are strength level >5. Plus ALL members of government. Now they can choose to not join the CAF, or to join private army groups, but the ones that do wish to join must be allowed to joined, and given a decent amount of supplies without question. I'm basically advocating a policy of "no noob left behind". Now all of these soldiers could then be transferred to the "insert patriotic name here, with slight hints that this division is filled mostly with second-class soldiers who are not nearly as important as the rest", I.e. "The CAF Reserves". No just joking there, but maybe we can name this squad "The Canadian Home Guard" (sounds better than "reserves" no?). Also, members of government should not be allowed to take orders from private Military groups, and should be forced (by law), to stay with the Home Guard, or to switch-over (temporarily).

The second group of government-funded soldiers could be a division of Canadian Elites and even regulars (Mostly tanks, and those with lvl 9 or 10 strength, etc). This division could also incorporate all of the CAF's Commanding officers, even if they do not have the required strength levels. Now this division's task is to enlist AS MANY possible Canadian Tanks for the Canadian Armed Forces. This group could be called the "Canadian Rangers" (named after the WW2 American Special Forces). However the amount of tanks + regular soldiers allowed to sign up, must be decided when looking at the budget provided for the Rangers, officers will need to find the best "deal" or the best combination of soldiers to enlist so they can bring the biggest bang for the buck.

The rest should be left for private military groups to take care of. That includes all mid-level players that have been left out (around strength 10, but not quite high enough for "tank"), any tanks that have been left out, and of course, any noobs that have decided to join a private army instead of the CAF.

Private Military Organizations/Contractors



Now we know that all those who have not been included in the Canadian Armed forces will be sucked up by the private military groups, the question is, since the groups will have to work alongside the CAF, should there be any guidelines a private army must adhere to in order to be considered an eligible Private Canadian military contractor?

Well the answer is, YES.

Firstly, to even qualify as an official Canadian private military contractor, the "leader", or "owner" of such groups would be required to sign an official contract with the General of the Canadian Armed Forces. Such a contract should include things like (of course this is just a very very rough version):

-Conform to ALL the protocol listed below below (see "Home Front Protocol", and "Foreign Front Protocol" down below).
-All Commanding officers, leadership, and owners MUST be Canadian Citizens cleared by the CSIS.
-All supplies, gold, and any other support given by the CAF to *insert organization name here*, must not be used in any other way, or for any other purpose other than those outlined by the CAF's commanding officers.
-Additional contracts may be negotiated and agreed upon is deemed necessary by the Canadian High Command.
-Failure to comply with ANY of the terms in this contract will/may result in (depending on the severity of the situation), the temporarily/permanent ban on any of the *organization's name*'s members, and a fine of X gold. The Canadian Supreme court will decide the punishment of the said "crime", and the *insert organization name here* agrees to receive any "punishment" that the Supreme Court of Canada sees fit. All "punishments" may be carried out with the help of an admin, in which case *insert organization name here* agrees to pay the 15 gold fine issued out for soliciting admin help.

Home Front Protocol
The "Home Front Protocol" refers to the required guidelines and rules that the said organization must comply to and adhere to without question, when any one of Canada's provinces is directly under attack.

-The CAF may or may not supply the organization with supplies, if they deem necessary. However the supplies must ONLY be used as instructed by the CAF.
-The Organization may receive orders ahead of time, however they must keep these orders private, until it is necessary to carry them out.
-The Organization must take DIRECT command from the CAF, and cannot act on it own free will.

Foreign Front Protocol
The "Foreign Front Protocol" refers to the required guidelines and rules that the said organization must comply with and adhere to without question, when Canada's provinces are not under direct attack.

-The CAF may or may not supply the organization with supplies, if they deem necessary. However the supplies must ONLY be used as instructed by the CAF.
--The Organization may receive orders ahead of time, however they must keep these orders private, until it is necessary to carry them out.
-The Organization may present the Canadian High Command with an official notice in case they wish to carry out missions elsewhere, and do not wish to take part in official CAF missions. However the CAF may choose to "out bid" an organization's previous contract if they deem necessary, and if they wish to solicit the organizations resources anyway. Such things may be negotiated between the CAF's commanding officers and the Organization's leaders.
-The Organization MAY NOT, in any way, shape or form, engage in combat AGAINST Canadian forces. However ONLY if given permission by the Canadian high command, an organization may work/fight for, and "enemy of Canada".

The Reasoning/Logic:

"Now why on earth", you may say, "would you want to make things soooo complicated?"

Well the answer is simple, its simply better. And I'll explain why:

First of all, 1ronman once asked me "what positive things did the Canadian resistance movements do for Canada?", and to answer his question, I may need another paragraph, so bare with me, or simply skip ahead.

From a psychological perspective (we must remember that we are playing with humans), being in an underfunded, and over-sized military organization makes one feel "unimportant", or makes one feel like a mere statistic. Private military organizations help to make one feel "special" once again, and give him/her a new desire to play this game, and to feel as though his/her efforts are very much appreciated. Such things help to motivate individuals to put more effort into Canada's defense, and to spend more time and money to help Canada succeed in its struggles. Also, since the CAF is so big, its very hard to fund everyone properly, and supply the proper amount of weapons and tickets. Therefore the Resistance Movements helped to create independent companies and basically fund their members by themselves. Thus the same citizens were fighting for Canada, but this time, the had weapons too. The Resistance movements simply allowed for more troops to have more access to more/better weapons. The key word everywhere being simple, "more".

Now my view is as follows, Canada does its job by helping all those who are under 5 strength get that 5 gold and super soldier medal, and to become better fighters(thus raising the national strength level). I don't know, maybe it was the months of DAL brainwashing, but I seem to be deeply interested in helping new players get started, and again maybe due to some secret DAL brainwashing scheme, I now see it as the government's responsibility to help out ALL weaker players in Canada.

Now helping all the noobs and congressmen will cost quite a bit, so whatever else remains should be used not to fund EVERYONE ELSE, and thus spreading that money over too many heads, but calculations must be made on to how to use that money and how many and what level soldiers the army should recruit in order to MAXIMIZE the potential of that cash. Maybe its better to have 10 level 10 strength soldiers rather than 3 level 15s, maybe not, that's something Coda and the rest of the CAF will have to decide.

But I mean, why sacrifice damage points to make the CAF fund ALL those who have lvl 5 strength and above. Only an arrogant and obnoxious government would believe that they have the material resources to PROPERLY fund their ENTIRE population.

I mean, look at Romania: http://www.erepublik.com/en/article/meet-the-army-must-read--773742/1/all. Clearly they have realized the potential that private armies can bring to a Counties overall power.

Just think about it, Canada has a certain amount of gold it can spend on its armed forces. Canada can:

1. Fund EVERYONE, and this not have enough weapons for everyone, AND do way less damage than in option 2.
2.The CAF funds as many people as they can, in the way in which they will receive the biggest bang for the buck. The key is not to fund everyone, its to maximize Canada's overall damage potential in battle, and that may mean sacrificing regular Canadians for tanks. The REST of the Canadians would then be swooped up by private contractors who would also possible be paid and supplied in times of emergency (who needs hospitals when Hungary is attacking Ontario?), and when there is no emergency, can pay themselves by working for anyone else in the world interested on hiring them.

Plus since the management is cut down to private military organizations, they can organize their own companies and thus every faction can even MAKE their own weapons, PLUS fight on contract for other nations PLUS get paid in times of emergency.

But what about loyalty?

Some may say the the orgs will one day turn on Canada, and destroy it. Well such people are clearly schizophrenic, or have autism and are very very opposed to any sort of change.

First off, ALL commanding officers/leaders of these orgs must be CANADIAN, and CLEARED BY THE CSIS. Plus, most of its members will probably be Canadian. And hey, if Bruck hires 15 Hungarians to fight for Canada against Hungary, does it matter their Hungarian? Its not like we're giving them citizenship or anything..

But most orgs will probably be 100% Canadian, and no Canadian in his right mind would destroy his nation.

As for a PTO, since only Canadians can vote and run in elections in Canada, any org consisting of Canadian members who wishes to "take over" Canada, is in fact not actually "taking it over", since they are indeed Canadian. So what if these groups are political or not? What are we now opposed to any REAL political opposition to the mighty Jacobi regime?

My friends these groups are like the CAF, and they will be commanded by people who are just as committed to Canada (or else by a binding contract), the only catch is that they must fund themselves, and they will not (unless its an emergency) receive government support. That means they will have to gather funds, make companies, and yes, even fight for other nations. And unless they fight for Hungary, when Hungary is attacking Canada, or another country that Canada has an active MPP with (which they CAN'T because of, common sense, patriotism, and of course, the contract), there is no problem.

The Conclusion:



For any of you that skipped to this part, Shame on you!

Therefore I believe that I have brought my point forward to advocate true change in the CAF. I think the government should fund all noobs, and save the rest of the money for maximizing its potential damage, while leaving any Canadians not included in the "maximizing potential damage" plan to be taken care of loyal-to-Canada, privately-funded, Canadian Military organizations.

And by looking at Romania, which was (and still is) a superpower, we can see that I am not the only one, nor the first, who has thought this way.

And as a congress member, I ask YOU to help me with this plan, and suggest any changes if you see necessary, and/or debate this issue if you have a better idea. I will then write a follow-up article with the conclusions to the debates brought up in the comments section, because Canada is in YOUR hands, and YOU can decide now what is best for YOUR nation.

So please, comment, but be careful, because the Doc will make quick work of naughty, flaming trolls. 😉


Naughty troll at work.

Signed,
Octavian_F
Congressman of Canada

Thanks for reading.