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I Blew a Load

Day 1,962, 10:57 Published in USA China by The Joshua Tree


Greetings, citizens of eRepublik.

I'm The Joshua Tree.



(see?)

You may have previously known me as the U2 album by the same name. But that was years ago, before I was eborn (before Plato was even born!).

I have been hanging around here for about 8 months now, and up until yesterday (day 1961) I had always only ever logged in to work, fight, read some news, and not much else. It's a fun way to play because you get to watch everyone get all bent out of shape at each other for practically no reason while you sip your mid-day gin and tonic(s) with your other hand suspiciously down your trousers.



I sacrificed all that yesterday for what became "my moment".



As in #1 in the world among all Division 2 fighters for just one day.

Wait. Did I say "moment"? I suppose I did. But I meant "moment" in much the same way that those 8 hours with a Vegas hooker constitute a single "memory".

I climaxed 27 times.

#27
#26
#25
#24
#23
#22
#21
#20
#19
#18
#17
#16
#15
#14
#13
#12
#11
#10
#9
#8
#7
#6
#5
#4
#3
#2
#1

And somewhere along the way there was this:

50/50





But what about some maths, JT?

(I'll give you some maths, but don't expect any sex/alcohol humor, because this is maths.)

I, like you all, bought the Combat Stash. So I had 20 Bazooka Boosters laying in wait. I bought 20 more for 26 Gold, plus I bought the 8 Hour Viagra (ok maybe some sex jokes) Damage Booster for 30 Gold. So I basically spent the Gold that came with the Combat stash plus some spare change.

I had 20 of those x2 Energy Bars, plus another 18 regular Energy Bars, and one of my MU friends sent me the tanks and food I needed.

I already had over 40 Bazookas, so I built those.

I probably also spent about 1K cc or so in moving expenses, so there's another 5 Gold spent, so round it at about 60 Gold spent.

What did I make?

27 BH medals at 3.3 Gold each (remember, the combat stash increases the medal reward by 10%) netted me 89.1 gold, plus the 5.5 for the Mercenary thingy gets me to 94.6 gold won. (My referrer got a nice payday too!)

So even though I blew my load yesterday, I ended up better off than I started. That 34.6 Gold I earned will help pay for the Rocket Factory upgrade I am going to need as soon as I hit level 30.



I have some people to thank:

First, I must thank Deepchill. He is the Easy Company Commander, and it was his idea to turn yesterday into a killing contest. That is what gave me the idea to blow off so much steam.

Second, I must thank Gnilraps. He approached me on the first day I joined this game and talked me into spending $140 on Gold. That Gold bought me enough Training Grounds upgrades that by following his plan of (what he calls) "clicking wisely" (dude's sort of a word nerd), I now easily make more gold than I spend. (I almost always BH just by doing my DO).

Third, I must thank my MU Easy Company. I swear, all you all in other Military Units, you have no idea what you are missing. The entire time while I have played this game I watch nearly everyone argue over everything. In EZC, we just chill and have fun. It's like watching Friday Night Fights on TV. It's entertaining, then it gets dull, then you turn it off. But after you turn it off you still have everything that's great about life still around you. Easy Company is like that. And eRepublik is like Friday Night Fights constantly, and I am not talking about the Battle module.

Fourth, I really must apologize to the few people I sniped out of some Battle Hero medals yesterday. I know that is bad form, and I really don't play like that. But yesterday I took a break from ethics (remember, this was Vegas, an expensive hooker, a bottle of Wray & Nephew Rum, and the Penthouse suite). I probably fought for a few of our enemies in some of those battles (although I refused to fight for eUSA against Taiwan.) Anyway, I'm sorry about all of that, and it really won't happen again.

I am going to stop thanking people now so this doesn't start to sound like Oscar Night. Nobody wants to hear that.



All of this has caused me to start my own Newspaper. (So I guess subtract another 2 Gold from yesterday's take.)

I have no idea how much I'll write, or even what I'll write, but until my next article, enjoy your life in this eWorld, where the streets have no name.

-JT
 

Comments

DariusReg
DariusReg Day 1,962, 11:40

8h dmg boster...hmm Any way great job on the bh run, you were fantastic

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,962, 11:51

That dmg booster paid for itself easily.

Clydeo
Clydeo Day 1,962, 11:54

Fantastic.

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,962, 12:26

Thanks. And your votes on my BH announcements all day made it all that much more fun for me.

Clydeo
Clydeo Day 1,962, 12:28

yea I hope to be a tank like you eventually.

Kortanul
Kortanul Day 1,962, 12:00

Was more interesting to watch your BH run than the night I fought hard for a BH against an AFA member and panicked at the sight of you walking in on us. I'll never know what 27 BH's in one day feels like, but damn was that impressive to see in my feed adding up.

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,962, 12:27

I always look for AFA people to beat out of BH gold. Isn't that standard practice?

Thanks for your support yesterday. And today.

Kortanul
Kortanul Day 1,962, 13:00

Well yes, but I had been holding on, maintaining a 200k edge over him and ran out of supplies right as he gave up, then you showed up with your 45k kills and I just stared, "I can't watch this..." and then you just stopped. That was my first time seeing you in battle, and since then I've decided that I just don't touch one if you're involved. xD

You're both terrifying and a wonderful source of pride, being a fellow EZC soldier. You're my motivation to build strength.

Deepchill
Deepchill Day 1,962, 12:00

Perfectly trained EZC soldier.

He is just a beast now.

o7

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,962, 12:28

Dude, you are the best. Just the best.

Clydeo
Clydeo Day 1,962, 12:28

no you are

FabMao
FabMao Day 1,962, 12:03

Great story!!
EZC is one of the best model about how to fun in a warm field. I am happy to be here learning and having fun with great people

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,962, 12:29

I don't know you yet, but I recognize that uniform, so you must be awesome. Maybe I remember you used to be EZC when I first joined? Is that right?

FabMao
FabMao Day 1,962, 12:35

Well its possible, I was here some time ago and I've back

Yuri Kaczynski
Yuri Kaczynski Day 1,962, 12:05

You rocked the eWorld yesterday! Congratulations, man!

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,962, 12:29

Thank you Yuri. And your kinds words yesterday made the day even better.

MaestroAkel
MaestroAkel Day 1,962, 12:14

congrats! that was just something else.

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,962, 12:30

Thank you. I hope you have similar success with your Combat Stash.

MaestroAkel
MaestroAkel Day 1,964, 10:54

maybe i can get couple or more BH but thats not gonna work that well bc I spent about 224 energy bars in these last two Albanias against Serbia wars. It broked me so It will take lots of time to recuperate

ShinmenTakezo
ShinmenTakezo Day 1,962, 12:19

It was stunning.

ShinmenTakezo
ShinmenTakezo Day 1,962, 12:22

I'm buying votes for your article. Congrats on your awesome run.

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,962, 12:30

Oh my. Thank you.

Gnilraps
Gnilraps Day 1,962, 12:33

I sent some cash your way ST

Deepchill
Deepchill Day 1,962, 14:28

Don't go to hard on the vote buying, I already did it.

ShinmenTakezo
ShinmenTakezo Day 1,963, 06:34

one of us should get a refund then. I bought 600

FunctionNine
FunctionNine Day 1,962, 13:10

I voted and Subscribed.

You may have just inspired me to start a newspaper too.

Wolflordy
Wolflordy Day 1,962, 13:12

I swear... if only I did this in D2

Gnilraps
Gnilraps Day 1,962, 13:34

Watching him do this makes me ache over all the gold I wasted boosting my worker skill back in the day.

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,962, 15:22

Thanks Gnil. You know how much you've done for me. Even though I have no idea what you are talking about.

Keltonion
Keltonion Day 1,962, 13:49

Awesome story man. Def a v/s from me.

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,962, 15:22

Thank you, and nice to meet you.

Dogpyle
Dogpyle Day 1,962, 13:54

Great job yesterday, JT, and a great article as well.

Voted and subbed.

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,962, 15:23

You are one of my favorite EZC. Your paper cracked me up the other day.

crashthompson
crashthompson Day 1,962, 16:45

Congratulations.

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,963, 17:45

Thank you crash. I hope you stick around a long time.

Freddie Effin Mercury
Freddie Effin Mercury Day 1,962, 16:53

I tried to vote all of the BH's you won, but my finger gave out long before you finished.

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,963, 17:45

Your paper is awesome Buck!

Bobby Canell
Bobby Canell Day 1,962, 16:55

I should have been the one to refer you.

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,963, 17:45

My referrer has made about 108 Gold from me so far.

John Largo
John Largo Day 1,962, 16:59

EZCo sounds like they do a good job training new players to become the future of America's fighting force.

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,963, 17:46

You have no idea...

RYuriy
RYuriy Day 1,962, 17:13

voted

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,963, 17:46

Thank you!

Vijalob
Vijalob Day 1,962, 17:53

"...don't expect any sex/alcohol humor, because this is maths"

Have you never seen a diagram of a right triangle? Note the placement of the, errm, shall we call it, "right angle mark" between the "sides that are not the hypotenuse."

Vijalob
Vijalob Day 1,963, 20:59

the box between the...

bigcdizzle
bigcdizzle Day 1,962, 17:59

This was epic. Congrats man.

CURRAHEE!

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,963, 17:49

Thanks C. Your votes kept me going.

Kara Beth
Kara Beth Day 1,962, 18:03

Awesome job!

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree Day 1,963, 17:49

Thank you Kara Beth. And my oh my but you have lovely armpits.

 
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