Ambient on/off

Sign up

 

Continue

Continue By creating an account you agree to the Terms of Service & Privacy Policy

How to become an elitist - 10 step guide

Day 1,221, 20:15 Published in USA Canada by Emperor Rick

1) Ego stroke the established community!
This starts by making small comments about the whole, particular party, or group of people. You have to be careful however if you want to become an elitist you need to know which group belongs to what. Don't pick out an individual yet because you probably aren't familiar with everyone. Think of it as high school... Do you want to be known as the kid who hangs with the geeks? I don't think so, so go ahead and praise the USWP! Don't forget to label yourself as a Dioist either, that's what all the cool kids do.


2) Bandwagon their ideas no matter the content!
Once you're familiar with the elitist community, now is the time to start mimicking some of the players. Be careful of original thought and content!!! You don't want to stick out just yet. Nothing angers an elitist more then competition, just regurgitate and praise the OP and you'll be fine.

Remember, the elitist is always right... even when they're wrong.


3) Don't forget to make threads praising the dear leaders!



Cult of Personality Definition: A cult of personality arises when an individual uses mass media, propaganda, or other methods, to create an idealized and heroic public image, often through unquestioning flattery and praise. A cult of personality is similar to hero worship, except that it is established by mass media and propaganda.

This can be done easily - Example: referring America as Emerika
A tiny bit of creativity is fine, just don't go overboard.


4) Slowly become one of them
This is perhaps the longest and most difficult step since it requires an elitist to acknowledge your brown nosing. You'll know that you are on the right step when they invite you to hold a cabinet position in a party or ask you to run for Congress. But don't think you've made it because this is also where the road ends for many failures who think they're now somewhat important. It's a test to see if you can follow the chain of command, which is to say you're still on the bottom... but congratulations! You're on the food chain at least.


5) Up and coming star, or the flash before going out.
Main contributers to failure: Inactivity, IRL lives, inability to ass kiss, and last but not least luck/timing. It's a true tragedy when you see someone almost make it, then something happens, and they spiral out of control leading to rage quit... Their hopes and dreams foiled by the elitist community. Like I said earlier, elitists do not appreciate competition and they will butt heads with you sooner or later. The longer you can go without conflict the higher the chance you'll make it.


6) Congress 5X+, Party President of the USWP, my god son you've made it!
By now you'll probably notice that you are collecting ass kissers of your own. This will now allow you to start thinking for yourself. You can come up with all sorts of horrible ideas and people will agree with you because of how elitist you are. Sure other occasional elitists may challenge you (they are known to eat their own to gain further fame) but if you have acquired a large enough fan-base this won't matter. You won't have to appease or be civil to anyone. The Admins on the forums will at worse wave a finger at you in disapproval.


7) Run for POTUS and WIN!!!
The ultimate test of your elitist status, If you win you are now an elitist for life! Gratz



8 ) Now that you're an e-god, now what?
Steal gold from the US Treasury (Uncle Sam), get banned, start over as a noob

9) ???

10) Profit


Misconceptions:
A) Being in the military will earn you respect - FALSE

- Being in the military will not give or take any elitist points. The military is on a whole different reality.

Example: Sir Valaro Volcrum, former Commanding General of the United States Mobile Infantry never got an ounce of respect from the elitist community. Why? Because he spoke his mind. Yet we have others like Harlot who commanded a lot of respect from the establishment. Why is this? You tell me.


B ) Gender equality exists in this game - False

- If you have tits, you will automatically earn alot of points with elitists due to the gender gap. Just remember the golden rule... It has nothing to do with your brain, and everything to do with tits. Once you learn how to exploit this golden apple. You'll get far. Ask Claire Littleton.

Sit back and watch the hate comments unfold below B)

 

Comments

Gutter K Day 1,221, 20:23

Comment deleted

Dio Eraclea
Dio Eraclea Day 1,221, 20:27

Don't bad mouth Eugene Harlot, by insinuation!

+V -V +S -S +V +S

Princefigs
Princefigs Day 1,221, 20:28

Can I get tickets to the world you come from? Seems like an interesting place full of gumdrop houses on Lollipop Lane.

Your delusional paranoia is refreshing in these times. It reminds us all of the people we need to ensure never hold any position of power.

chickensguys
chickensguys Day 1,221, 20:29

I'm an elitist scum and I haven't done all of that.

Emperor Rick
Emperor Rick Day 1,221, 20:34

Oh Princefigs you're such a walking stereotype
never change

Salinger
Salinger Day 1,221, 20:34

This is effing brilliant. Subscribed and voted.



Epic.


Princefigs
Princefigs Day 1,221, 20:40

Emperor Rick , you are such a fail magnet...you WILL never change.

obenitedang
obenitedang Day 1,221, 20:44

..........
...................__
............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\
........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
.........\.................'...../
.............\.......... _.·´
............\..............(
DIODIODIODIODIO

Endy
Endy Day 1,221, 21:14

heh, this was pretty good. v/s

everyone head to the forums and join the ranks of the elite of the Elitists!!!

http://eusaforums.com

Richard Nixon II
Richard Nixon II Day 1,221, 21:18

I did enjoy that. By the way our "statesman" Harrison Richardson has stolen from the treasury and destroyed our forums once.

Bill Hook
Bill Hook Day 1,221, 21:21

A big +1 on the Claire Littleton comment.

Joseph Dinero
Joseph Dinero Day 1,221, 21:35

You know....you will never be an elitist with articles like this...

George Armstrong Custer
George Armstrong Custer Day 1,221, 21:49

Pricefigs is a perfect example.
just repeat his comment, followed by "100x" and they'll send you a recruitment letter.
and don't forget to praise the cartoon god above all.

aurelije the family guy
aurelije the family guy Day 1,221, 22:06

v+s
you really know how to express thoughts into written words.

Leroy Combs
Leroy Combs Day 1,221, 22:38

v+s

Pizza The Hut
Pizza The Hut Day 1,221, 23:02

Voted for teh lulz

Guerilla of LagaLuga
Guerilla of LagaLuga Day 1,221, 23:25

v+s

Turd Fergusen
Turd Fergusen Day 1,221, 00:03

I am elitist because I have done almost nothing of worth for this country yet still feel I am better than all of you.

Inwegen
Inwegen Day 1,221, 00:47

SVV was never accepted by the "elitists" because he never proved a strong understanding of game mechanics, was in Israel for quite some time after being in the states (he moved around a lot.. hard to become 'elite' if you're always leaving, and never really wanted to be apart of the "elite" group. Much of what you listed doesn't make you an elitist. You're an elitist when you're accepted by the elitists as one of their own.

Jovan Tekelija
Jovan Tekelija Day 1,221, 00:57

funny how the completely the same social structures develop in totally different countries :]
voted!

Ivan Terible
Ivan Terible Day 1,222, 03:14

good article

v

mkey
mkey Day 1,222, 04:20

Some people just need to be e-light wherever they go, it's the order of the lesser mind.

sunnygyrl315
sunnygyrl315 Day 1,222, 05:47

hahaha voted

Ronnie McBeard
Ronnie McBeard Day 1,222, 09:05

Voted, subbed. Great article, Rick.

So true...

I think the best thing about the eMilitary is that it's a way to break free of the elitist BS... I got a position in the TC just by being active and responsible. So if you're tired of the elitism in eRep, join the TC! (I can already feel Princefigs preparing to spew his disagreement... lol)

Chutley
Chutley Day 1,222, 09:22

People shouldn't take this so ePersonally. Most of this rings true in all walks of life, so why not here?

Coyote99
Coyote99 Day 1,222, 12:03

Lol@article and Ronnie. V+S for a good laugh

Krystina Steube
Krystina Steube Day 1,222, 22:57

lol the butthurt comments are from the elitists.

Thedillpickl
Thedillpickl Day 1,222, 00:23

I thought these "programs" usually have 12 steps.

Glove
Glove Day 1,223, 09:44

V+S

These are all pretty valid points and are pretty accurate. The only one I would disagree with is the Dioist argument, as Dioism is not popular at all anymore and those who cling to it are actually targeted. Anyways, nice.

Chance Harrison
Chance Harrison Day 1,617, 14:34

The longer you can go without conflict the higher the chance you'll make it.


I live for conflict! \o/

David Wilson
David Wilson Day 1,617, 15:00

@Chance Harrison, some of the most polarizing and hated figures are elitists (read Pfeiffer). Just because you speak your mind and are controversial doesn't exclude you.

Going rogue and purposely hurting your country because, well after all it's just a game... that definitely hurts your "chances". Elitists are people who play the game to win, all others are just well... enjoying the ride.

Alexander Valkor II
Alexander Valkor II Day 1,688, 00:02

You know, this is the first time I've read this and I noticed I got a shout out. Too true Rick.

 
Post your comment

What is this?

You are reading an article written by a citizen of eRepublik, an immersive multiplayer strategy game based on real life countries. Create your own character and help your country achieve its glory while establishing yourself as a war hero, renowned publisher or finance guru.