Join the new world

Potpourri

---

"Gratitude is the healthiest of all human emotions. The more you express gratitude for what you have, the more likely you will have even more to express gratitude for."

-- Zig Ziglar


Jokes

---

When I bought my new Corvette, my two sons asked me who would inherit it if I met my demise. I pondered the question, then told them if I passed away on an even day, the son born on an even day would get it. If it happened on an odd day, the one born on the odd day would get it.

A few weekends later, while river rafting with one of my sons, I was tossed out of the boat. As I floated into the rapids, I heard oldest my son yelling, "It's the wrong day!"

-o-o-o-o-

Top Ten Signs Your Amish Teen is in Trouble
10. Sometimes stays in bed until after 5 am.
9. In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women
without bonnets.
8. Shows up at barn raisings in full "Kiss" makeup.
7. When you criticize him, he yells, "Thou sucketh!"
6. His name is Jebediah, but he goes by "Jeb Daddy."
5. Defiantly says, "If I had a radio, I'd listen to rap."
4. You come upon his secret stash of colored socks.
3. Uses slang expression: "Talk to the hand, 'cause the
beard ain't listening."
2. Was recently pulled over for "driving under the influence
of cottage cheese."
1. He's wearing his big black hat backwards.

-o-o-o-o-


During a rather rowdy party, one unattached female guest kept disappearing into a back bedroom with one man after another, including the host. This did not go unnoticed by the host's wife, who was quietly smoldering, but kept her composure, so as not to ruin the party.

It was still fairly early when 'Miss Willing' approached the hostess
looking somewhat frazzled and rumpled. "I'm sorry to rush off," she
explained, "but I don't feel too well."

"Of course, I understand my dear," was the hostess' response. "You must have a splitting backache."

-o-o-o-o-

Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect."