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You are reading an article written by a citizen of eRepublik, an immersive multiplayer strategy game based on real life countries. Create your own character and help your country achieve its glory while establishing yourself as a war hero, renowned publisher or finance guru.

COBRA Finalizes Sale of Canada's Secrets

Day 590, 21:15 • Published in Canada Canada

• by COBRA Organization

The Jacobi government has failed to protect Canada's national secrets from COBRA. Failure of the bureaucracy.

The Jacobi government has failed to pay COBRA to protect Canada's secrets from everyone else. Failure to outsource.

The Jacobi government is good at failure. We here at COBRA prefer to take a different approach.

Some time ago COBRA began shopping around Canada's secrets to a variety of interested parties. We spoke with the French, the Hungarians, PEACE command, and a variety of other private investors. COBRA offered a weekly update of all of Canada's inner government secrets, from all levels of government.

Today we are happy to announce that a winning bidder has emerged. He has asked not to be named, and we have asked that the amount of his winning bid be withheld.

But..... we are COBRA..... and no one will believe us if we don't announce the identity of the client.

So the man who now owns all of Canada's secrets is.... Former Prime Minister TANTIS

Congrats on the winning bid, thanks for the money, and we hope you enjoy seeing the country from the eyes of COBRA.

Comments

Joelsem Day 590, 21:18

Didn't see that buyer coming.

PimpDollaz Day 590, 21:22

yeah, but who does he work for now?

Cypher Rahl Day 590, 21:31

Wow what a total load of Bull. Go puff another one under your skirt AB. Now lets get back to something importent... where are those nail clippers!

Jake Bravo Day 590, 22:13

Is the moral of this story that our countries biggest secrets not really worth that much, or very few actually care to have them?

Hang on to those magic beans Tantis.

rolinsgal Day 590, 23:54

Weak.

Grimsey Rabbit Day 591, 01:56

I'm still waiting for proof. Casting aspersions is pretty weak, and I've seen nothing but talk from COBRA so far.

Andy Goolahee Day 591, 05:54

1. Awesome.
2. I love how after taunting foreign governments with Canada's "secrets", he is left selling them to a fellow Canadian. Too funny.
3. Anyone willing to check the political affiliation of Tantis' friends list will notice a neat pattern emerge!
4. Awesome.

Dean22 Day 591, 07:45

Fail.

Reed Dotto Day 591, 07:50

COBRA has always been fail. Is this a surprise?

Reed Dotto Day 591, 07:58

So overall... Jacobi failed at protecting Canada's secrets from someone who held the position of PM and didn't use his position to harm Canada in the past.

As mentioned above I think this just goes to show all other countries think COBRA is a joke as well and would not give them a penny.

Also, this is still most likely just made up so that he has something to say.

Alex_1210 Day 591, 08:36

No he does have something to say.He gave me secrets.Its pretty freaky how corrupt government is.I don't support Cobra or am part of it but agree with some things that it has to say.

OShaudy Day 591, 09:43

And what are some of those things alex

Citizen B Day 591, 09:53

"3. Anyone willing to check the political affiliation of Tantis' friends list will notice a neat pattern emerge!"

What would that pattern be? That Tantis has been a long time player in the game, and has a friends list that include other high level eCanadians? That's about it. Don't read anything else into it, or you would be mistaken.

Citizen B

Cesar Augustus Day 591, 10:12

This is a lie so why bother checking into Tantis's political affliation.

Reed Dotto Day 591, 10:53

It is funny how COBRA says "we have asked that the amount of his winning bid be withheld". I assume this is because their highest bid was so sad that they don't want it to be known.

Cesar Augustus Day 591, 12:58

haha most likely Ab can split a CAD or two between his agents 😛

Augustus Baldwin Day 591, 13:57

*shrugs* ask Tantis, he IS active you know. We got paid a sum that we felt justified our month long effort. He just happened to be willing to beat anything anyone else was willing to pay.

Don't be jealous because COBRA actually WORKED. This money is for us to enjoy, not for you to observe. Maybe next payday we will just throw the money at you guys for fun.

And a hint: the payment was a lump sum, not monthly, and it was worth slightly less than what we demanded from the government.

jbdivinus Day 591, 17:50

GO COBRA GO AB

Sonny Chiba Day 591, 19:34

He seems to want sympathy from the people in his vendetta against Jacobi yet he wants the government to pay your tax dollars to protect our secrets. Why anyone would vote this up eludes me. Aside from the very low level relief from epic tax talk.