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3 Reasons Why Emerick Already Fails as a President
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The eAmerican media is a tough nut to crack. There's often such a drive for a newspaper to have the "big scoop" that the news sometimes seems like a 25-hour cycle. But allow The Fair Dealer to be the first to break this story, before any other newspaper.
It's official: Emerick FAILS as President of the United States!
Now I know, Emerick isn't technically president yet, but I'm pretty sure he's already doing an awful job at it, and I can prove it:
1. Look at how many states we've lost! - Sure, Emerick wasn't really president when that happened, but he is now, so this is HIS FAULT. A smart Congress would impeach him now, so he can be removed before the election is even finished.
2. Emerick hasn't placed Q5 Hospitals in every remaining state! - WTF.
3. Emerick hasn't replied to my PM on how to win the war! - Sure, I borrowed it from this great e-mail I got from Ajay Bruno, but come on, ruling from the ivory tower like that is why he's already failed.
Ladies and gentlemen, I've lost faith in our President before he was even President. We must Em-Peach Emerick!
Note: This is a work of lols.
The eAmerican media is a tough nut to crack. There's often such a drive for a newspaper to have the "big scoop" that the news sometimes seems like a 25-hour cycle. But allow The Fair Dealer to be the first to break this story, before any other newspaper.
It's official: Emerick FAILS as President of the United States!
Now I know, Emerick isn't technically president yet, but I'm pretty sure he's already doing an awful job at it, and I can prove it:
1. Look at how many states we've lost! - Sure, Emerick wasn't really president when that happened, but he is now, so this is HIS FAULT. A smart Congress would impeach him now, so he can be removed before the election is even finished.
2. Emerick hasn't placed Q5 Hospitals in every remaining state! - WTF.
3. Emerick hasn't replied to my PM on how to win the war! - Sure, I borrowed it from this great e-mail I got from Ajay Bruno, but come on, ruling from the ivory tower like that is why he's already failed.
Ladies and gentlemen, I've lost faith in our President before he was even President. We must Em-Peach Emerick!
Note: This is a work of lols.
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1 reason why you fail as a newspaper writer, I don't see an article!!
OLOLZ.
love you nick
Boring use of preemtive defense.
Ok I look stupid now.
LOL Geez.
"before any other newspaper."
done that, been there
"Sure, Emerick wasn't really president when that happened, but he is now, so this is HIS FAULT"
LOL. Can't argue with that logic...
cant wait for the first person that comes in here and actually agrees with you.
(ajay?)
Heheheheh. I love jokes in a time that they're needed.
Who did you vote for Nick?
Hahaha, love this commentary! Great work:D
When talking about the disastrous RL Iraq War, Dick Cheney can also use the excuse that wasn't really president. But, a logical mind knows better.
Emerick will continue to rule from an ivory tower until said ivory tower is all that remains.
He will fail. America will lose. But, the drones will never stop yelling, "Emerick is great! Emerick is great!"
Nick is always right! BOOO EMERICK!
Emerick just became our president and we shouldn't blame him for our current problems because they happend before he was president. he'll make a fine president and revive our nation
2. Emerick hasn't placed Q5 Hospitals in every remaining state!
PEACE PROPAGANDA!
"PEACE PROPAGANDA! "
True story.
i lold
" Look at how many states we've lost! - Sure, Emerick wasn't really president when that happened, but he is now, so this is HIS FAULT."
He's also a FAIL because he's Emerick.
The greatest thing about sarcasm like this is the people who don't realize that it is sarcasm.
Rock solid defense
Nick you epic fail
LOL
Bahahahaha. This is hilarious.
NAIZ! Best article you've written yet.
To everyone who recognized this as sarcasm... cheers! To those that didn't you rather proved his point by your reactions.
oh yeah, the very first sentence says SATIRE
I feel so obligated to say Emerick is fail... but he is my Emerick-sama... thus... I LOVE YOU EMERICK!!!
I have the best comment here. Teehee.
By the way, completely LOL'D at this, please write more.
Nick- hey buttercup this was epic LMAO stuff. Voted.
I officially apologize for my failings as president v_v
Please go easy on me
hahahahahaha great satire
I completely agree
Weird.
<a href="http://www.erepublik.com/en/article/another-day-another-region-884570/1/20" target="_blank">http://www.erepublik.com/en/article/anot[..]/1/20</a>
This article sucks