25 jocinji, preti vajag 25 komentus, Danke!

Day 2,486, 13:25 • Published in Latvia Latvia • by BlackHex

1.A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

2. It's so cold outside, I actually saw a gangster pull his pants up.

3. You know you're ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera.

4.Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Breasts don’t have eyes.

5. What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.

6.I don't always have time to study, but when I do, I don't.

7. For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened.

8.A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it.

9.What’s the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

10.Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand.

11.I say no to alcohol, it just doesn’t listen.

12.My birth certificate was a letter of apology that my dad got from the condom company…

13.Lottery: a tax on people who are bad at math.

14. I used to think the brain was the most important organ. Then I thought, look what’s telling me that.

15.The dyslexic devil worshipper sold his soul to Santa.

16.Just read that 4,153,237 people got married last year, not to cause any trouble but shouldn't that be an even number?

17. Why don’t you ever see hippopotamus hiding in trees? Because they’re really good at it.

18.How does NASA organize their company parties? They planet.

19.What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.

20.Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a well known six offender.

21.How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb? Let’s go play on our bikes.

22.Why can’t a bike stand on its own? It’s two tired.

23.Last night I almost had a threesome, I only needed two more people!

24.I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

25. Just went to an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.