I Keep My Pimp Hand Strong...

Day 907, 13:48 • Published in USA USA • by Chocolate McSkittles

Well...let me go back and explain.

eRepublic touts itself as a game that allows players infinite avenues for gameplay.

We have seen giant banks and beggers alike try their hand at their respective fields.

Deciding that my resume (VP, DCoS, D-WC, DoCA) looks rather boring, I recently found an opportunity to spice up my resume.

It all started with me hanging in my Vice Presidential office. Fingerguns walked in and said

"Choc, I need a MAN!"



Actual screen-shot of my face at this moment in time.

My mind began to race the speed that Dan Wang races into a new thread, preparing a lovely acceptance speech to this great honor. Until I heard...

"And I want you to find him for me!"


Actual screen-shot of my face at this moment in time.

"I want you to be my Pimp!"


Now, as Vice President of these United States, I held a brief internal moral debate regarding whether it was acceptable to pursue a side hobby on my free time. However, as you may have noticed, Fingergun's used exclamation points on all three of her sentence fragments, clearly showing excitement.

I for one find it very hard to say no to a girl who's that excited to get started.

While some may say this new side hobby disgraces the office of the Vice President, I would counter-argue that the only disgrace here is that the office of the Vice President is already being disgraced by the fact that I do not wear the following attire to work:


It would be physically impossible for me to add a caption that increases the awesome of this picture

With that incentive in place, of course I accepted.

Not to say finding Fingerguns a "male" would be challenging. What could possibly be challenging about finding a "male" that would be interested in this


In a militia eh...feisty!

The eUSforums alone has a 12:1 male:female ratio, and I am pretty sure most of the people that sign up as "females" are actually Emerick.

But you see, Fingerguns isn't lookin for a boy.

Shes not lookin for a man either.

Shes looking for a MAN!


Acceptable

With this goal in mind, I have the gargantuan task of weeding out the boys from the men. To do so, a select few will be chosen to participate in an challenge at a future date, one that challenge the very fiber of every participants being.

Are you man enough for Fingerguns?

Sign up here to find out.

Chocolate McSkittles,
American Pimp


EDIT: Requested forum discussion here - http://eusforum.com/index.php/topic,23783.new.html#new