(enter witty title here)

Day 1,722, 11:07 Published in United Kingdom New Zealand by Mr Knee

I don’t think anyone can deny that Big Ant is highly active, enthusiastic and highly communicative (especially in the past where his level of activity was borderline spamming at times). As a member of the UKPP, I should also give a nod up to the fact a fellow member of my party has finally been given a government role from one of the other 2 main parties.

This is not intended as a direct attack on Big Ant, but is one of part amusement at the general defence of him and his performance in the past 6 months.



There have been numerous comments...

...made in several articles recently about Big Ant’s performance in various departments. Last month someone questioned his performance as head of the MoD. The response (paraphrased) from Big Ant and friends was:


He is doing a good job as evident from the fact he has previously worked for a month in:

+ the Foreign Office x1
+ the Home Office x1
+ the Ministry of Defence x1
+ the Ministry of Sound x1
+ the Ministry of Silly Walks x1
+ deputy PM* x1
+ blackboard monitor at school x 1 (week)

On the basis of these prior roles, he is clearly a great and skilled head of the MoD”.



Aside from my own personal view...

...that a single month in a role is insufficient time to properly learn it and to stamp your foot into it and mold it, there seems to be a general view when defending him that it is a question of quantity and not one of quality. To be frank, the way he has repeatedly got new roles, spent a single month in it and then rewarded with a different and new role the follow month has a certain “Position bingo”. Now he has been voted in as PM, I did expect his first article to contain him shouting “Housey, Housey” and showing the bingo hall manager the fact he has ticked off all the squares.

In terms of actual performance...

...in those roles, I can’t think of anything particular stand-outish or remarkable about any of them. I’m sure those in the relevant departments at the time can cite a long list of achievements under his stewardship. Of course, some praise has been taken for the fact Poland came in and side by side kicked the French’s backsides. I might be doing Big Ant a disservice, but if your country has been overrun by the enemy then approaching your allies (especially the bigger ones) and asking for help is hardly groundbreaking, original or setting a marker as a military leader.

Likewise...

...in Big Ant’s pre-election comments about what he wished to achieve, his plans for the military was critiqued by people in various military units. A lack of understanding perhaps? His friends will say “no” and point out that he has been in 6 different department in the last 6 months.



I...

...have no idea how successful Big Ant will be as PM – no doubt it’ll be classed as a success with the fact he has now held every role in the eUK as evidence of this. As a citizen of the eUK, I naturally hope he does do a good job.

I should probably write a summarising final paragraph...

...to bring everything together but cannot be bothered. I suspect that upon being critical of BigAnt that I’ll be accused of trolling etc. No doubt my lack of positions in a cabinet will mean I am disqualified from having a valid opinion on this – although as Big Ant once said to me, if I want a cabinet position (after getting elected), I’d have to leave the UKPP. Although the fact a colleague of the UKPP has been given a role this month probably suggests this policy has now been scrapped.

But actually as an afterthought...

...I promise to mock anyone who in the future defends Big Ant’s performance on the basis of the fact he has managed to tick off all the boxes on the list of roles in the eUK government. If Big Ant himself points out he has a long list of prior roles, then I shall also imply that the “big” in Big Ant is also a case of over compensation in other matters where the length of the list of his roles is in direct inverse relation to the size of his penis.


*(where he did a load of publicity stunts in a John Prescott type manner, maybe)