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[AMP] The Day the Music Died.

Day 2,038, 12:50 by John Killah


And this was all he wrote folks - I sincerely ask you listen to the music provided while reading this article. You may need to loop it, but it is a poignant piece.

A special Radio Episode of "A Killah Kommentary" will be held at 16:30 eRep in which i'll discuss this a bit more and open up the floor to questions - http://mixlr.com/john-killah

It’s strange … to feel sad yet liberated. There are some steps in this game that are never easy ones to take. You look back, wonder if you did the right thing constantly, wondering if you’ve made a mistake and the whole thing is just setting you up for a bigger fall in the future?

But what if your future isn’t the way you or other people planned it? At the end of the day, we each have to make a choice sooner or later. And in the end, this was my choice, my burden to both bear and relieve.



What are you talking about?

With effect tomorrow (20th June 2013), for all intents and purposes in the metagame, I will be stepping down as Party President of the American Military Party. I thought long and hard about the choice … 8 hours of work and the thought that was constantly on my brain was debating with myself over whether or not to go through with it.

It’s never easy leaving your home. AMP is really the only political party I’ve ever known … Sure I was in the USWP during my extremely early years, but I was the proverbial zombie - Voting where USWP needed voting, then returning to my 2-Clicking. It was AMP where I got my break though, where I was asked. I’ll get to a eulogy in the next section, lets try and stick on topic xD

What caused this decision? A build up of emotions and burden or responsibility that finally broke my back last night. Before she made it official, Sarah Killah asked if I would be upset if she left the party. I told her honestly, yeah a bit, but after our previous conversations, I knew she’d have perfect reason to leave … I didn’t expect the reply that she was going to. Talk about gut-clenching.

The horror played in my mind for the next few hours. She knows how I feel ofc, there isn’t anything I keep from her (Will get to that later), but not even I knew until a few minutes to 2am when I blurted out without thinking - I’m retiring. I didn’t even think the statement through, but as soon as I said it, I knew it was what I was going to do. Sarah understands naturally, but lets get down to why I’m doing this.

I’ve been in that party’s leadership for over 20 months … Closing in on 2 years of constant dedication to the party, never taking a break, never yielding. I don’t anyone who’s served with me that can begrudge me for leaving, they all know what the pressure can be like. The PTO served as an inspiration, a re invigoration … I got a thrill from taking charge that fateful morning we realised what had happened. It felt good to climb into the big chair and try to fix things. It was the pursuit of conviction and vindication that kept me going at full steam all the way to Party Presidential Elections.

But then last night happened and I took a good hard look at what was going on. This nation is in dire straits … Not because of the PTO … but because of us players. Look at what this PTO has done to us? The atmosphere EVERYWHERE is toxic … people can’t play and get along nicely anymore, we’re all snapping at each other, clasping our hands around peoples throats simply because they don’t share the same opinion as us.

It’s how it is in the AMP … I’ve never seen so much infighting and attitudes in my time there. The old AMP was a place where we had barbed, witty comments and heated arguments but at the end of the day, rallied together in friendship. I don’t see that anymore … I just see comments aimed to maim, people constantly on the verge of leaving only to be talked out of it temporarily.

And the sad thing is, I won’t even be moving to another T5 party, because while it may not happen in their leadership, their party still contributes to the same afflictions on a national scale. There is no need for it people … *points at the AFA* THE ENEMY IS OUT THERE, NOT IN WITH THE REST OF US PATRIOTIC eAMERICANS! … People need to let go of grudges, let go of anger, animosity, anguish … pain.

They are cancerous feelings and emotions, and they’re crippling us. If it can lead to a parties most stalwart and decadent supporter leaving, who knows where the trend will end?



People to thank

I can’t thank everyone … I don’t think people have the patience to read that much. If my eLife was more exciting, maybe i’d write a memoir … hell, still might. If I do, I will mention everyone. But let me try anyway -

1) - Strangely enough … Haliman. He brought me to this game, helped me get set up, and was actually the person who took me on as a deputy in the game. I’ve not always agreed with his decisions, in fact, anyone in AMP and outside can attest that I have vocally been against them. But he was always kind to me and even though it’s not often, we still speak.

2) - Israel Stevens. Let me get one thing straight - You can be a right ***hole at times, and yet, I still have a lot to thank you for. You mentored me, you gave me advice and information even when I didn’t ask for it, you gave me my first real job in the party and helped me become more. As much as I hate saying it sometimes, I owe you.

3) - Brad Gwatney - Simply for kicking my ass during my 2nd PP Term. I hadn’t realised how bad I had become until you told me I was being a total dick and that I was ruining the party. It wasn’t pretty to look at myself that way, but I knew that because you’d said it, it was the truth … I tried turning myself and the term around for you.

4) - Emdoublgee and Dr Luis Sentieiro - We shared a lot of moments in the leadership channel planning didn’t we? We wasn’t some evil cabal of elitists like some people would think since we always considered peoples opinions and feelings when we talked about the direction of the party. It has been a tremendous pleasure to watch you guys go on to be fine Party Presidents in your own rights.

5) - Bruce Killah, Eric Vanderberg, Jack Mensley, Errorka (sugarfree), Gaara Killah … and so many more who have served with me over the years in leadership. Your companionship has always lifted my spirits until the day the spirit was broken. There are many memories I will have of everyone who’s been in that room … it’s quite numerous to be honest. Every single one of you have left a mark on my life in one way or another.

6) - Cerb - Yes I know you can read this Cerb, the Lawyer Dog. Thank you for pushing me to finally run for PotUS and giving me the courage. I may not have been the best at the job, I may not have been able to dedicate all of myself to the job like I wanted to, but I was at least given the opportunity to try thanks to your encouragement.

And finally, obviously and quite easily - 7) - Sarah Killah - I can actually still remember the first time I’d heard of you. It was eNPR and you’d called in after being in the game for, what, a week? I remember thinking you had this lovely voice. I certainly didn’t expect to find you end up in the AMP and then in leadership as well. But since then, you’ve been a source of joy and laughter, and in recent times, you’ve been one of the core reasons for me staying where I am. You have honestly been my rock and I can’t even begin to thank you enough for managing to put up with me xD



And so, I guess this ends a chapter in AMP’s history. One more oldie out of the way to make room for a newer generation. I hope the party fixes itself and tries to thrive once more. Maybe it needs people like me out of the way who keep some of the old ways to allow for new ways to take root and grow.

I never wanted it to end like this, but it has to be this way. Where will I go now? I don’t know … it’s not just AMP I’m retiring from, but politics as a whole … I’ve spent too much time there and I’ve had my fair share of drama, backroom dealings and scheming. It’s too dirty and is no place for someone who was brought up and is bound by honesty.



And with that, this is a Party President, signing off for possibly the last time.



 

Comments

John Killah
John Killah Day 2,038, 12:51

First denied, for so long ...

Lord Nimrod
Lord Nimrod Day 2,039, 05:20

wer is moi name there?

IbnuDjula
IbnuDjula Day 2,042, 00:48

pertamax ah

Dio Makso
Dio Makso Day 2,038, 12:57

.....4 days after election as PP?

Free Area
Free Area Day 2,039, 07:35

they should have elected me xD

Oblige
Oblige Day 2,038, 12:57

Swan song keep your head high.

George S. Patton Jr Day 2,038, 12:59

Comment deleted

Norbengo
Norbengo Day 2,038, 13:00

It was fun trolling you Brit.

Don't let the door hit you on the way out

Bruce Killah
Bruce Killah Day 2,038, 13:04

You, and everyone on your list, have been great friends and great people to have unwittingly met in this crappy game. All of you made AMP another home for me. I cant even thank you enough for letting me use the Killah surname. Bro, you will be missed...

Duncan Crowe
Duncan Crowe Day 2,038, 13:05

Hope AMP is able to adapt to this.

nice article JK.

olivermellors
olivermellors Day 2,038, 13:18

What the hell do you guys find to argue about????
Thank you for your service.

R U I N A T I O N
R U I N A T I O N Day 2,038, 13:18

John Killah, I could use words but I don't think there are enough words to ever thank you for everything you did for me and for the friendship you have showed towards me since I was just a little guy lurking around AMP.

I agree with every word said in this article and I miss the AMP of the old days. The AMP where we were all friends and where everyone could feel good without having bigger issues with a great environment.

I do hope, for the good of our party that this actions from Sarah and now John Killah hit us where we need and bring us back to what we used to be. This is not just a problem within AMP as a party but yes something in our nation. I hope the newer players can be better than we old ones were and I hope we old stay here to help the new generation to learn from our own mistakes. Lastly I do hope, as current acting PP to revive the party and create the environment it needs to function as it once did before!

AMPers, the hour for us to be greater than we once were has come! It is time to make our name and rise the flag high because it is up to us to do it! Once again...

For AMP and for John Killah...

Feel the AMPs!

The Valeyard
The Valeyard Day 2,038, 13:24

o7

Ronald Gipper Reagan
Ronald Gipper Reagan Day 2,038, 13:32

This is why you should've stuck with Free Area. He did a great job as PP and brought respectability back to the AMP!

R U I N A T I O N
R U I N A T I O N Day 2,038, 14:58

Shut up. I can't hear a single word from you. You are more reptile than man crawling in the face of earth. Seriously man, go throw yourself off a bridge.

Gnilraps
Gnilraps Day 2,038, 16:20

I would join AMP just to tell you to fvck off.

Your lack of respect for basic decency towards your enemies is, honestly, your worst trait. Worst among MANY HORRIBLE TRAITS.

You are the basest, most non-redeemable human waste I've ever encountered. And I'm married, so the competition is fierce.

John Killah Day 2,038, 16:38

Comment deleted

Viarizi
Viarizi Day 2,039, 00:34

LMAO

Anwnimos
Anwnimos Day 2,038, 13:34


ο7
ο7
ο7

Black Baroness
Black Baroness Day 2,038, 13:46

Thank´s for all you have done the the AMP for and the wonderful time with you in the Leadership Team!
Feel the AMPs !!!

RaccoonGoon
RaccoonGoon Day 2,038, 13:49

I've never been AMP myself, and I haven't really had occasion to make your acquaintance, but this is a poignant article and a good commentary on the state of our meta-game.

Good luck in your future ventures, and whatever you do, don't feel bad about this decision, 20 months in leadership (of anything) is enough to burn out most people. It sounds like you've done enough.

Israel Stevens
Israel Stevens Day 2,038, 14:34

Booooooooo you hussy!

Bruce Killah
Bruce Killah Day 2,038, 15:04

lmao

Mazzy Cat
Mazzy Cat Day 2,038, 15:07

You said many things.. That I just couldn't. I SO get it.

Meow ♥

Hale26
Hale26 Day 2,038, 15:14

Well said JK. Being in Party Politics can be tiring, and everyone needs a time to step out. For me, when I'm done in WTP after a few more terms I plan to go to eJP and become CP. Or something like that.

Good luck in the future mate.

Gnilraps
Gnilraps Day 2,038, 16:17

Perfect swan song.

Sir Jimmie Akesson
Sir Jimmie Akesson Day 2,038, 16:17

Strength and Honour

bigcdizzle
bigcdizzle Day 2,038, 16:48

Sad to see you leaving the political realm John, good luck in whatever comes next.


Also, I have to admit that I always read what you write as if it were said by the game reviewer for the escapist.

His voice:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4wgQvij3rVE

John Killah
John Killah Day 2,040, 06:47

I gotta say, that's a pretty close call ... Maybe I'll try imitate that for you one day

Clydeo
Clydeo Day 2,038, 21:38

Best of luck JK. You are simply amazing. 20 months wow.

Viarizi
Viarizi Day 2,039, 00:34

LOLOL

YAH BLAME IT ON AFA THOSE BASTARDS? xD


JOIN UFA WE DONT FIGHT!


LEARN WITH US WE ARE FROM SO MANY COUNTRIES WE HAVE AT LEAST 4 DIFFERENT TYPES OF ALPHABET AND WE ALL GET ALONG

R U I N A T I O N
R U I N A T I O N Day 2,039, 05:40

We have nothing to learn from dirty filthy PTOers.

Viarizi
Viarizi Day 2,039, 05:42

Loooooool

Our Serbian brothers will chase u out the White House

R U I N A T I O N
R U I N A T I O N Day 2,039, 07:07

Good luck with that.

Free Area
Free Area Day 2,039, 07:35

Luis, trust me you can learn alot from some "ptoers" xD

Jon Barack Bluejacket
Jon Barack Bluejacket Day 2,039, 23:56

Too bad all the countries you are from are considered parts of Greater Serbia.

Ghost of Tom Joad
Ghost of Tom Joad Day 2,039, 01:08

Good luck, John.

Zheng He
Zheng He Day 2,039, 06:28

07 John Killah
You're right, politics in erep are dominated by children with their heads stuck in middle-school games.

fingerguns
fingerguns Day 2,039, 06:30

John and Sarah sittin in a tree


oooooOOOOOOooooooo

John Killah
John Killah Day 2,040, 06:48

And the award for comment that made me giggle the most goes to ... this one xD ... No seriously, I giggled and smiled

Free Area
Free Area Day 2,039, 06:50

jk o7

Drew Blood
Drew Blood Day 2,039, 10:23

This article is so true and it is so sad that even I must admit to having fallen into the trap to which you elude, I have held a grudge against Henry Pfeiffer Arundel; I feel he cost me two -almost three- personas out of share hatred. I seldom darken the eUS Forums - where America's Congress is housed - because of the hatred spewed by some of the most asinine idiots, it reminded me of nothing more than a local BBS war board; sadly eRepublik is sliding into that same morass of hatred. Henry Pfeiffer Arundel and his followers started this hatred and Ronald Gimper Reagan has simple learned to use that method against America instead of for America while tanking for TWO....

Good luck John....

Leroy Combs
Leroy Combs Day 2,039, 11:24

Good luck John.

TorrinTheGreat
TorrinTheGreat Day 2,039, 16:16

Is it just me or do people take this game a little too seriously.

Trickstir
Trickstir Day 2,039, 16:24

Good Luck JK

Synesi
Synesi Day 2,039, 18:16

"The old AMP was a place where we had barbed, witty comments and heated arguments but at the end of the day, rallied together in friendship. I don’t see that anymore …"
Describes it well, dio-speed to you and your journeys

Gaara Killah
Gaara Killah Day 2,040, 01:10

Why is it that I am just now hearing about this? Anyways brother, will be seeing you soon. Take care of yourself.

Mr. Swagg
Mr. Swagg Day 2,040, 08:49

This is a little late, but it took me a little while to think of the words to express this, and even now, I don't think I am doing you justice...

John, to tell the complete truth, you have been like an older brother to me. You were one of the first members of AMP leadership that opened up and welcomed me in when i first started to get involved. You have always been supportive of me, and in all honesty, I can say that I ABSOLUTELY would not be here had it not been for all your help and support. From appointing me as your SoE to pushing me to run for Congress and PP, you have always encouraged me to shoot for the Stars.

Given the state of the nation, I am not at all surprised that you are leaving. The AMP and the eUSA will miss you more dearly than I think you can imagine. If there is anyone who has put themselves on the frontlines of the ATO fight for every minute of every day, it has been you. The marks you have left on the eUSA will not and cannot be erased, no matter what the future holds.

JK, I can promise you that your children, Dr Luis, M2G, myself, and the many others that you have assembled for the leadership of this party, will not let this party fall. We will not let this party become anything that you would not look at and be proud to day "That was MY party once." Though it will not be the same without you. We will carry on, with the thought of you in our hearts, and the AMP battlecry on our lips.

No matter what the future holds JK, i will always remember you.

My friend... My brother... My King

For the last time...

ALL HAIL, THE HONOURABLE KING JOHN KILLAH THE 8TH

 
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