The Ruins: The eCanada Story

Day 2,926, 19:35 • Published in Canada Canada • by Kaminarinote


I met a traveller from an antique land
Who sai😛 "Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fe😛
And on the pedestal these words appear:
'My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!'
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away."

- Ozymandias, by Percy Shelley

My name is Bruce Lightninghands, and I am, perhaps, one of the objectively coolest scoundrels that ever walked a turn in this browser game cum mobile app-like cash grab. In a three month period (Late April to Early July 2014), I went from nobody to President of eCanada (for, like, a week). Within a month from that, I went from President to Latvian to the sacred heart of the eUSA - Canada's greatest enemy at the time. I later retired to eJapan where I, ostensibly, died. That is, of course, until today.

eCanada itself has died, more or less, and in truth I have returned out of curiosity more than any actual care. I had assumed eRepublik had finally shut down, but that clearly isn't the case - though just by a slim margin. I come with no goals, no plans, no intent...but to watch. I'm here to see the world end, as I wanted to see when I started playing seven years ago (yes, seven, I started playing on November 4, 2008, with my first character: the insufferable, childlike invalid Hitoshi Makoto). Much has changed, for me and for the game, and I'm here to see how it all. Winks. Out.

So, effective immediately: I, Bruce Lightninghands, by Grace of Dio, hereby claim the throne of Canada. I retain my titles of President-in-Canada and Reichsminister of Propaganda, and assume the newly-created title of Emperor of North America. You may address me as "Your Eminence".

That is all.

- B.L.