Local News And If You Should Trust Your Nabour

Day 2,741, 11:32 Published in Ireland Ireland by Calum OConnell
The Local News



Local Festivals:

Dublin is a city of fun and this week certainly shows this. The first celebration of this week is the exciting 100 year anniversary of the O'Connell Irish Cream Whisky!


That's right! For over 100 years my family has made what, in my opinion, is the greatest drink on earth! The anniversary ball is freely open to all citizens of Ireland and will be a host to: Dancing, clockwork race horses, open bar (selling Irish cream at a 50% discount!), and fine food (served and made by our local citizens). The celebrations will take place, today, in the local St Columba's community hall at 7PM until 3am. I would like to thank the local priest (as always) for allowing us to host this exciting event there. I would like to please remind everyone that this will be a public event so please do drink responsible but do have a good time!

The second event this week will be the semi finales for the O'Connell's Irish Dancing League. This event will take place next Tuesday in St Columba's community hall. The competition has being tough but I would like to remind everyone that every boy and girl has shown amazing skills! The dancers are: Sean (An 18 year old boy from Limerick who shows some amazing jumping skills!), Helen (a young 17 year old girl from Downpatrick who is quick on her feat), Winnie (a 21 year old woman from Wexford who has a lot of experience), Sophie (a 19 year old girl from Dublin who is pure evidence of having a soul) and Alex (a 19 year old boy from Wexford who might be small but his courage makes up for it!). These contestants will be whittled down to only 2 dancers for the finales next week. The winner will receive an unlimited supply of O'Connell Irish Whisky and 100 IEP. Entrance to the dance will be 2 IEP per person with children under 6 and everyone over 60 being free. Buns and raffles will be hosted in the open bar section of the hall.


Local News:


There is a murderer on the lose in Dublin! On Friday the 22nd of May a murder was committed in south Dublin. The murderer broke into the female (aged 23) house and broke her neck with her own Irish Freedom Party supporter lanyard! What kind of devil would do this!?!?! Well this is the 22nd Irish Freedom Party supporter to be murdered in the last year! Coincidence?!!? I think not! I think it is clear that this murderer, whom ever he/she may be, hates the Irish Freedom Party and all of its supporters! But why you ask? Well they just don't want Ireland to be free! So angry at they at the idea of a free and thriving Ireland that they would murder a young, innocent, kind Catholic woman! If these are not a sign for change then this world deserves to burn in the fires of Hell! But who dun it?!?! Well this my loyal fans is what I ask you! Question everyone! This demon must be brought to justice! Has anyone you know said anything against Ireland or Catholicism? Has anyone spoke out against the freedom of Ireland? Has anyone even suggest that we reunite with the slavers (the English!) again?!?! If so that I think that they must be the murderer! And if they aren't then they might as well be! They would be killing our children! Ireland is the symbol for freedom and this shines in the Irish Freedom Party! A young woman lost her life for what she believes in! Would you deny her that dying wish to see a free Ireland in prosperity?!?! If you have any information on Anti-Freedom citizens please contact me and I will display their name as shame on these Holy papers! The good Lord knows who you are so even if you hide from us, you will not escape your fate in hell!

For this reason I will be running for congress as an Irish Freedom Party member! I will not allow this woman to die in vain! How dare you live your lives letting our overlords in this world stomp us into the ground! She didn't! She lived her life believing and fighting for what she believed in! And although short, she lived a greater and more important life than anyone who doesn't! I dedicate my running and this article to her! May she be in the garden of our Lord now...

Calum O'Connell - Vote for me if you care about freedom!