Pu Yi's eBlog Issue #2 - eExodus

Day 2,882, 06:51 • Published in United Kingdom United Kingdom • by Henry Pu Yi

Awakened after a long sleep, I stretch, yawn and look around, I find myself in an eUK that consists of two things.. poverty and dissolution. This creates confusion and unease, I think to myself, how far did I travel into the future for something so terrible like this to happen?

So, I visited the various taverns, the ghosts of once great veterans some trying to make a difference, others wallowing in their pit of despair with a dram of Scotland's finest whiskey, the crowds of new eLings begging for attention, fighting over Q5 food. One threw a potato at me as I walked past him, shouting "JION TORY PARTEE!!" others snarled and attended to their pity drivel.



And so I continued to the next tavern, t'had a rusty placard outside with a wobbly 'U' which read 'TUP'. I had remembered what the The Unity Party had done for the country, the lives they had saved and made secure. I stood dazed and confused as to why they had fallen to disrepair and so I entered with caution.

The reception room was damp, dim and smelled of despair. I continued through to the lobby and found myself at a bar, I ordered half an IPA from a quite, shook up bartender and sat at my table, sipping on the grapefruit flavoured bitter, awaiting social twitter.

I was greeted shortly after by kind faced fellows and lasses, one goes by the name of Rathena, I had found out she herself runs the joint and comes across as a stern character with a solid personality. Others were Amokkel, a proud war veteran and MS10EL, a strange person blessed with a keen eye and understanding of current affairs. As they both seated themselves I learned that eUK had fallen into a deep depression and those who once ensured the country's security and prosperity had left, in a sort of exodus, traversing the land as if their originality just didn't matter, forgotten souls who had forgotten the souls they had once cared about.

I finished my IPA and bid farewell, I rented a room and laid my head to sleep.

I awoke the next morning to hear screaming outside my window, a young eCitizen chased by a pack of blackened, smokey and red-eyed dogs, the guy tripped but was able to get back onto his feet and escape into the next tavern.

There was trouble and strife on the streets of eUK, not only rabbid animals and lost souls but we were occupied by eHungary and eNetherlands. The rising tension between our nations had only galvanised worry and uncertainty, and so I set foot in look for a militia group to join.

These hands of mine have done dirty rotten things, after hours of slaughtering and dismembering, the struggle came clear to me.. are we fighting for our national identity.. or are we fighting for prestige? What are we fighting for?

My thirst for knowledge and change grows, I headed back to the tavern, laid down my satchel and gun. I spotted a noticeboard past the vending machine, I wobbled over and read that the tavern were holding a conference meeting in which everyone who wishes to express their views and opinions can do so. I scribed upon my name and was approached by a few members, we discussed the main issues we currently face and agreed on where the conference is held.

Later that night, the wireless was on and the lights were dimmed.. half cut on a few drams and full belly with oatcakes and goats cheese I listened closely. It was announced that eScotland and eManchester were liberated and eHungary had withdrawn most if not but all of their troops from the regions. A small man stood up across the room and declared that we snatch back the provinces from the bastards. There were cheers, trophies strewn and songs of valour praised, old tales of victorious battles and how the empire once ruled the world were shared. Tankards thrown, snores filled the lobby and cheese stubbed into the crusty carpet.

I stumbled to my room and curled up into a ball, as I lay I remember that the world outside this tavern is a dark and evil place, an entity scratching at the walls, gnarling and writhing, snatching souls and spitting them back out to be tortured over and over for them to beg for mercy or simply give up on eLife.

We need change. We need it now. For if we don't, eUK will seize to exist.


Pu.