[AB] Portents of Doom!

Day 3,083, 02:16 • Published in Finland Finland • by Erwin Schauman


“So the ancient pillars of Tuonela tremble and quake, the timeless glacial halls echo with the sound of shattering ice and the anguished screams of the damned, who with one voice this message of doom for all ears deliver - “Prophet of Perkele, Erwin Schauman, has reawoken! His return heralds the beginning of the End, the last breath of a dying world!”

Repent, you of little faith, for you didn't heed the warnings! Now death approaches this world, its hairy claws already closing around its neck!

Hear my words now, mortal fools!

When an iron belt wraps the world; When headless horses traverse the roads; When apathy and greed rule the hearts of men; Seven times will the bell toll, Seven times the feather fall, Seven times the cursed king cough; Thrice shall the red sun rise; Thrice the peacock sing!

Then will the land be swallowed by darkness, all consumed by ravenous beasts, man made slave and forced to eternally suffer!

They are already here, your fate sealed. For this is the time...


OF THE GRAYLONIANS!

Yes, Graylonians! The forgotten tribes have grown strong while you have wasted your strength fighting each other for your petty reasons. The infinite armies of the Graylonians are amassing and are poised to devour the unsuspecting world and its apathetic citizens...

Steel yourselves, mortals! Soon you will bear witness to countless horrors and stare into the abominable faces of the Graylonian invaders. Make peace with your maker, and prepare for an eternity of sleep in the frozen tombs of Tuonela! Death awaits you with nasty, big, pointy teeth!


Graylonian tribal warriors, armed to the teeth

Yours lovingly,
King of Finland
High Priest of Perkele
Archtyrant of Transylvania
Minister of Marmoset Affairs